Reference :- Andy ( pragmatic multiculturalist ) Bolt sent an unveiled threat to the ABC's Paul Barry .

Reference :-    Andy Bolt threatened ABC reporter Paul Barry with legal action .  Mr Barry  described Andy as a hate monger,  which Andy considers a scandalous accusation .

 Top of the morn to you Andy .  Do you ever read the comments by your vile cult of followers ?  Well , obviously not , or you would be aware of the fact that you regularly pile fuel on the fires of just about every brand of blind prejudice invented .   Racism , sexism , scapegoatism ,  climate skepticism , anti intellectualism , cynicism and many more such "isms " abound in the innumerable semi-literate comments that sprout like toxic weeds in the comments beneath your scowling dial .

You are way overdue for a fuel load reduction , Andy .  I would be disappointed if you couldn't recall  our recent invention of the word " andibolt "   , a noun for a person who is a hypocrite about being hypocritical  (  the chaps at the oxford dictionary press will have received our letter by now ) .   Well, to simplify  all those nasty "isms " your viewers demonstrate , my son  Ken junior has come up with a gentle euphemism that gathers them nicely into a single word .  The lad is good at that kind of thing .  He has suggested the word "andiboltism "   The beauty of it is that we still have time to get it added to next year's unabridged tome before the professors at Oxford start cranking the roneo machine .

With regards to your unveiled threat to sue Mr Barry , Ken junior reckons why not settle the matter with fisticuffs ?  He figures you are probably into pugilism too,  and it would be an interesting match . Paul Barry looks to have good reach , but you have a weight advantage .   Before you duke it out , both parties would have to agree to Queensbury  Rules .  Five rounds should be enough to decide a clear winner .  You have spent enough time in court already Andy , and this would be quick and easy . And it needn't be too rough , just a bit of footwork and a few gentle jabs here and there , and let the judges decide .  

 Also , it would be a good little earner for Sky News when they broadcast the fight .   If you do decide to run with it , do you think you could get Ken junior a job in promotions ?  He already has an advertising headline in mind   .    "  Watch Andrew Bolt and Paul Barry settle their differences in a 'Slugfest to the Death' , here on Sky News " .  

  You know , I reckon that might get a few views .  

 Your comrade , Ken.

Reference :- Prime Minister Mr Scott Morrison faced resistance to his proposed " Freedom of Religion " Bill.

Reference :-   Religious leaders are rallying against the proposed new " Freedom of Religion " Bill.   The title of the bill is useful for marketing purposes , but religious leaders of all faiths are united in their opposition to it .   Why is that ?

Gee Mr Morrison , sir .   You are having a bad run at the moment . If you keep introducing bills that fail to be passed you are going to end up looking like a total loser .  It is unwise to give this one a run , since you may be surprised to hear that the leaders of faiths other than the venerable society of happy clappers are actually blessed with a certain intelligence and can see straight through a cynical marketing ploy . 

 That religious freedom moniker takes a few liberties with the definition of free.  It reminds me of all those supposed " Free Trade Agreements " that run to thousand of pages of freedom obliterating gobbledygook .   Or , better still  , those wrought  iron words above the gates of many Third Reich concentration camps    " Work Sets You Free ".    I have perused some of the document myself , and I think those religious leaders are right on the money.  That Bill has more strings attached than a starving spider .

   Take my advice , and forget the whole thing .  The racists who vote for you will think it really does give foreigners religious freedoms  , and feel betrayed . And the followers of the various faiths will look into it carefully,  uncover the deception and also feel right royally stitched up.    We are not much into the various deities and graven images here at The Sky Reply .  Although to each his own .  My son , Ken junior , has actually become an atheist .  For a while there he took an interest in Judaism , since he likes their tradition , informed by the Talmud , which promotes discussion rather than doctrine.   But then , after he told me that all the males must be circumspect , he quickly lost interest for some reason .      

  Your comrade , Ken   

Reference :- Paul Murray laughed at the idea of a four day working week

Reference : -    Let down by stunningly inadequate research , Paul Murray , the well known workaholic who intends to participate in the workforce full time until he is 80 years old , misleads us about the craziness of discussing a four day working week .

How's it going Paul ?   Good luck with your plan to work long hours into old age . ( I assume, since you are telling the rest of us we must , that  you intend doing the same ).  But I reckon if that is your plan , it might be wise to shed some lard before your myocardium suffers an excess of infarcts . 

 Did anybody research this story for you Paul ?   I guess not , or you wouldn't have run it at all.     You see,  the countries in the OECD  with the best living standards,  the happiest citizens , the most wealth , and the least unemployment, tend to be the ones with the shortest working weeks  .  Big companies that moved to four day weeks , found that productivity increased , and profits rose , because staff who are less stressed do a better job .  They are also more faithful as employees , and contribute more to innovations that enhance efficiency .  

 Advances in technology have increased the total production of goods and services in the world to the highest level per capita in history .  If the benefits of this were shared more equally , the average person should be able to work fewer hours and still enjoy a better living standard .  That means less unemployment , less stress , less need for childcare , more time for  study , more time for cultural activities , happier workplaces and fewer cars full of debt slaves choking the toll roads every day , chain smoking while they contemplate the best way to kill themselves .  

 Why not do some research and run the story again ?   After you run a detailed cost /benefit analysis your opinion will be much changed . Unless , of course , you are just an overpaid hack chanting the war cries of your neoliberal masters .   My son , Ken junior , has been running his own four day week now for quite some time .   He wags school one day each week,  to stay home and bake his special herb cookies .   The teachers don't mind , because he puts in a big effort on the days he is there , always offers to clean the blackboards , and still gets top marks in most subjects , the smart little bugger.    Also , the teachers buy a fair share of his herb cookies each week, and he is making money faster than the CEO of my superannuation fund .

  Your  comrade , Ken

Reference :- Andy ( I am not a hatemonger ) Bolt interviewed himself ..again .

Reference:-       Andy Bolt ran another segment in which he talked about himself a lot , and showed us clips from one of his previous presentations .  We were rather disappointed , but he must still be whipping up his big one about how " the destroy australia party " defeated the union bashing bill .

Andy , the crew here at The Sky Reply broke open the popcorn last night , hoping to watch as you terrified the nation with a story about how unionism was destroying democracy and the future of our children . But not yet, hey ?   I can see how , with union bashing  hammer in hand , you are searching for a way to turn climate change into a nail before running the story .   I have faith in you Andy , you will figure something out .   And don't delay , we don't want the popcorn to go stale .

Anyway , I will take this opportunity to offer some feedback from your fans here at The Sky Reply .
Young Monte is not a deep thinker .  All he talks about these days is wheelies , carburettors , and his latest Evel Knievel poster  . But he did say "  Do you reckon Andy could go more than two sentences without calling somebody a hypocrite ".   I told Monte it is probably because there are so many hypocrites around these days . Maybe give it a go anyway Andy , just to please the lad . (Plus we have a little bet going on that one ).    Gabbo ( the aborigine ) is not disposed to hatred , but is sorry for you, since he feels that you are so disposed.  He says your rants about multiculturalism and aboriginal culture conceal your underlying hatred like a band-aid would conceal a terminal case of smallpox. 

 The thing about aborigines , as you know from your numerous court appearances , is that they are inclined to readily forgive when an apology is made .  Gabbo is endowed with a similar sangfroid , and is not a vindictive type .   This is what he says  " I don't think Andy is such a bad old fart  .  I reckon he will probably repent one day soon when he is trembling on his death bed riddled with painful spite fuelled metastases  from his cancer of the everything . "  I guess Gabbo might not attend your  funeral , Andy . 

    As for my son , Ken junior , he made the mistake of reading the comments by your cohort of followers on You Tube . He found them so illiterate , misinformed and vile that he bolted from the breakfast table and did a technicolor yawn all over my prize winning geraniums .    I hope they survive Andy , otherwise Sky News will be getting a letter of demand from my lawyers .  Nothing personal you understand ,  your insurance ought to cover it .   

 Your comrade , Ken    

Reference :- Our government told us that the banks haven't been " persistently breaking the law" as our unions do .

Reference :-  The government , in it's desperate , and so far failed , bid to bring in their  new  union bashing bill informs us that rogue unions have been breaking the law two to three times every week.
 However , the banks , they tell us , don't need to face any " bank bashing " legislation since they have not " persistently " broken the law.

Well , to plagiarise  the late author , Douglas Adams, this must be some new usage of the word " persistently " with which we are not familiar .   If we set aside the findings of the banking royal commission , and just consider Westpac's  latest transgressions , there appear to have been about 23 million of them .   How does that compare with two to three per week ? 

  Fortunately my son , Ken junior has a phone app , whatever that is , which can do simple mathematical calculations .  He just ran the numbers , and it turns out that the unions would have to continue breaking the law at that rate for the next 192,000 years to merely catch up with Westpac .  I think that illustrates the need to slap most of those so called "bashing "  laws on to the banks , not the unions . And with great haste . 

 Also ,  I suggest you discourage the use of the term "bashing " .  It sounds like everybody  hates the unions and wants to cripple them , but without them we probably wouldn't have superannuation or medicare , among many other things .  Have you noticed how wages have remained stagnant since union membership fell to under 20% of the workforce ?   And now the economy has stalled because nobody can afford to buy anything .   (  Except , of course , the CEOs who are making out like bandits . ) 

 That calculator app on Ken junior's phone sure works a treat , maybe Mr Angus Taylor , current minister in disgrace , should run one to stop him getting his figures wrong.   Ken junior says the telephone company is promoting a "two for the price one " deal for apps at the moment , so for no extra fee he might also be able to install one that tells him when his arse is on fire .   

 Your comrade , Ken

Reference :- A domestic report from The Sky Reply .The kids are skipping school today.

Reference :-   Along with his best mates , Monte , and Gabbo ( the aborigine ), Sky Reply co-editor  Ken junior is skipping school to protest about climate change .  

 Well good luck to them I say . We may as well go mad with demonstrations before the right honorable Mr Scott Morrison starts throwing people into Black Marias if they so much as wear a green T shirt . The lads are running a fund raiser for the fire fighters at the same time , as are many other students across the country  .  Although we were disappointed that Andy " I am not a racist " Bolt didn't make it to Gabbo's band's fund raiser at the pub the other night , we still raised quite a few quid . If the kids raise a few more today we can get a couple of new tyres for our local volunteer fire brigades's  1964 Bedford fire truck.  

 Young Monte will be giving the younger kids rides around the school yard on the back of his old motorbike .  Although he is years away from getting a license and the bike isn't roadworthy , he is quite a little  " Evel Knievel ".  He charges one gold coin for a blast around the oval . For two gold coins he does a wheelie , and for three gold coins you can also wear a helmet . Though nobody does , for fear of looking like a sissy.   

The last time he ran his bike rides fundraiser , Monte was briefly concerned when one kid burned his foot on the exhaust .   But then the kid's mum dragged him off the bike and snapped  "I told you not to put your bloody foot on the hot exhaust you little idiot.  "  Gabbo is selling a few dot paintings on home made boomerangs . Last  time he did that I asked him if all his boomerangs really worked , and he said they must because he has never had one come back .  And my son , Ken junior has set up a stall where you can throw darts at caricatures of politicians you don't like . He has done up half a dozen of Mr Scott Morrison , since last time that caricature was in shreds by smoko time .

 Despite the heat and dust , we expect a fun day , and in the evening we will have a beer and laugh at the  red faced Sky News anchors as they splutter about unscientific student activists being the pawns of leftie idealogues  .  Gabbo won't be able to come though , he will be online with a student in  Norway working on his assignment  "  The use of the  'isolated source tracer ratio method ' when measuring  methane release from melted permafrost " . Whatever that means.

 Well, that's all from the home front  for now .    Your comrade , Ken
 
 

Reference :- Popular Prime Minister , Mr Scott Morrison lies low after making a few strategic blunders .

Reference :-   While defending Minister Angus Taylor , who misled parliament , Mr Morrison misled parliament himself  , with an incorrect quote .  He is now hiding  , which might be a good idea before he jams his foot further down his own throat .

Mr Morrison,  sir .  Things are really getting out of hand in parliament today , and I reckon you did the right thing staying home .  Your  " good old uncle Scomo " mask has slipped very badly now , and it's not a pretty sight .   I don't wish to be presumptuous , but a bit of perspective from afar might be what you need right now .  

Your marketing credentials are impressive enough , otherwise how could the LNP have snatched victory at the polls from the jaws of the socialists ?   But marketing is one thing , and getting things done is another thing altogether .  You might find this analogy useful to ponder while you are hiding out .   A car salesman might be able to sell somebody a lemon , if he is good at marketing .  And fortunately , when the customer discovers he has bought a lemon , it is the mechanic in the service department that cops the complaints and has to fix the car .   You don't have that luxury .  Having sold the country your Prime Ministership, you actually must then competently deal with the country's many issues .   It's not like winning a raffle . Having won at the polls , you now have a serious job to do, which isn't easy .   

 Why not step down ?  You have done your job getting the Tories re-elected , so why not take a break and hand the Prime Minister's role to somebody else ?   Young Josh is making a dog's breakfast out of running the finances , so maybe give him a go at the top job instead.   Or just let the front bench run their own little " Ides of March "  and see what happens .   My son , Ken junior , says you are welcome here any time , the change of scenery would do you good.  He wants to challenge you to a game of   "  Dictionary " .  You know, that game where you win by deceiving your opponent with fake quotes .  The lad wins every time , but  reckons you would be a worthy opponent .   

Your comrade , Ken .
 

Reference:- Peta Credlin ran a story accusing Jeremy Corbyn of being anti-semitic . Though easily discredited , the timing is interesting .

Reference :- Peta Credlin , treating us like a friendly  pet dog , throws us an anti semitic pork chop to distract us while the Tories try to steal the NHS from the vulnerable British .

 Hi there Peta . In a previous Sky Reply, the myth of Mr Corbyn's anti semitism was exposed to your fellow media celebrity Andy Bolt .  So why bring it up again ?   

You can read it yourself, it was posted on November 16th .  The final quote was from  British Jewish historian Geoffrey Alderman, an orthodox Jew . "  Corbyn has an impressive demonstrable record of supporting Jewish communal initiatives . "    A Parliamentary Committee also found  " no convincing or reliable evidence " of endemic antisemitism in the Labour Party .   So that's that , and why bring it up?  

  You pointed out that Mr Corbyn has refused four times to apologise for anti-semitism .   That is because he isn't anti-semitic !    Its like that old line  " Are you still beating your wife ? " .  

  Anyway , Peta , your timing was quite a distraction from Mr Corbyn's current revelation of a 451 page paper in which Mr Boris Johnson entertains selling off the NHS to private American companies .     Of course , he has regularly denied that, but he has been known to broadcast the occasional porkie about the NHS .  Sometimes by plastering the porkie across the sides of giant buses .   Look Peta, you might be able to regain some credibility by running a story about Islamophobia among the Tories .    Or perhaps make amends by explaining how 90 % of the British support the NHS , and 66% would be happy to pay higher taxes to keep it .
 The last thing you want to do is give the appearance you are pushing a particular ideological agendum  by deliberately misinforming us .   

 Your comrade , Ken   

Reference :- Andy Bolt and Rowan Dean are annoyed that the current Westpac bank scandal has become a smokescreen for their worst crimes .

Reference :-  Andy Bolt , extremely slurred of speech again , for some reason , teamed with boy wonder  Rowan Dean to tell us the real reason we should despise Westpac .

Andy my friend .    I see you  were kind enough to tell us which pronouns you prefer , which is a good idea because you wouldn't believe the one my son , Ken  junior , uses for both you and Rowan . His is a silly pronoun in any case , since I don't believe such an activity is physically possible , though these days nothing shocks me . 

What is it you are fond of saying ?   " To a man with a hammer , everything looks like a nail ".   You were sounding a bit hammered yourself in this presentation , but let's put that behind us.   So Andy  , you use that expression regularly to knock those who see climate change as the cause of our every woe .   But you must be careful to not be similarly obtuse.   On this occasion you actually said that  Westpac's belief in climate change is partly to blame for ruining the company .  That's a bit of a stretch isn't it ?  

 Westpac stands accused of 23 million breaches of the law, allowing free rein for terrorists and child rapists to do business .  It faces fines that could amount to 1 trillion dollars .
You chaps , however, believe that taking the time to print a small booklet describing how their business model is adapting to climate change is more deserving of scrutiny .  Gentlemen , it's not a good look for you. It gives the impression you have no objection to anybody kiddy fiddling while Rome burns .
 

Anyway  , Ken junior is sticking with his preferred "pronoun " for describing you chaps , though he has ratcheted it up a few notches . 

 Your comrade ,  Ken 

Reference :- Rowan Dean has ruined our games of "Outsiders" cricket .

Reference :-  Rowan Dean has stopped prancing about the stage in front of his weather chart while  he rants about the climate change  hoax . Is he deliberately ruining our game of "Outsiders" cricket ?

Come on Rowan , you piker . Some time ago I let you know about our hilarious games of " Outsider " cricket , and since then you have been letting the lads down terribly . My son , Ken junior , and his best friend , young Monte , have to provide their own entertainment out here in the bush , and they used to eagerly anticipate their games of  " Outsider " cricket until you stuffed them up.  

 To recap , whoever was batting scored runs for the various puerile cliches you spat out .  " Shock horror " , for example was one run .  Hysterical gestures also scored runs , with the highest being a six if you said "Hummm " while stroking your obicularis oris with a finger tip.  Each time you pranced , fairy like, to the other side of the stage , the batsman was deemed bowled out , and the other side went in to bat .  The lads would usually be laughing so much that it was my job to keep the score .

   But Rowan , of late you have been staying on one side of the stage and the first batsman is never bowled out . Your puerile rants have been fine, but you have to move to the other side of the stage regularly . Last night Ken junior was first to bat , and he scored 23 million not out by the time you finally shut up.  Poor young Monte didn't even get a chance to pad up.   That's really not cricket , is it ? 

 
Anyway , if you could oblige by prancing about like a mongolian trotting duck the way  you used to ,  it might cheer up young Monte , who has stolen one of my tall bots of home brew and is currently hiding in the outhouse sulking .

Also Rowan ,  I am trying to work out a way to introduce scoring runs for each
" made up " fact you come out with .  If we call it just  one run for each ,  that still gives Monte a fair chance of catching up.  The hard part will be checking which are your "made up" facts quickly during the game .  There's no point in asking your cohort of followers to help us fact check , for obvious reasons .
 Let me know what you think .   

 Your comrade , Ken

Reference :- Paul murray called a recent post of Mr Abanese's "Thunbergesque ".

Reference :-    Paul Murray , supported by his annoyingly puerile offsider , Rowan Dean ,  described a speech by Mr Albanese as  "Thunbergesque " .  But why is that ?  What is the connection ?

OK Paul, and Rowan .  Where was the connection with Greta Thunberg ?  I think what you have done is invent an adjective that describes anybody you don't agree with .  Well did you notice The Sky Reply did that recently with Andrew Bolt ?  The Sky Reply coined the word " andibolt" to describe somebody who is a hypocrite about being hypocritcal .   I think you could be in breach of copyright with your " thunbergesque " , since I thought of the idea first .  

 I have no desire to pursue this in the courts , though doubtless I would win a large settlement . Under the circumstances , I would be happy to settle the matter in return for an apology and a consideration of a paltry one  hundred quid , which is what I currently need to feed my orpingtons for the month . .    My son , Ken junior reckons I should  " take those pricks to the cleaners " but that is not my style .     Payment by cash in a brown paper bag would be appreciated , since you can't trust the banks these days .  After recent revelations he says he wouldn't even walk into one unless he was wearing a chastity belt .  In future , I would appreciate it if you consulted me first before stealing my ideas . I am not an unreasonable man , and you can rest assured that a suitable deal can always be struck .   

Your comrade , Ken

Reference :- The Energy Minister , Mr Angus Taylor, faces an in-depth probing .

Reference :-   Energy Minister , Mr Angus Taylor , accused Sydney Mayor , Clover Moore , of wasting an enormous sum of money on staff travel.   But the figure he quoted was very wrong , and a police investigation is underway .   Mr Morrison stood by Mr Taylor in parliament today .

 It is a bit messy , isn't it gentlemen ?   And an annoying distraction when the business of the day is to bury the unions in an unmarked grave using legislation nobody has had the time to read properly .

What were the numbers again?   Angus  quoted 15 million , and the true figure is 6 thousand  or thereabouts , I seem to recall .   Quite an error for somebody with a PhD in economics .  In this instance , as I said in a previous post , why not give Angus a break and just call it staggering incompetence ?    I mean , an error that big is the same as saying a 6 dollar Big Mac cost 15 thousand dollars , and an economist should know better . But let's not waste valuable police time with an investigation.    There is no shortage of dodgy grifters to keep them busy .  Obviously you can't have him running a portfolio that requires arithmetic  , and since the Energy Minister has lots of numbers to deal with , there would need to be a minor reshuffle .  

 I wonder , Mr Morrison , is  Mr Les Patterson still Minister for the Arts ?  If so , he must be getting a tad long in the tooth by now  , and would probably be happy to step down and give poor Angus a go.  Though Les obviously keeps to himself these days ,  as soon as you mention that in- depth probing you are sure to get his attention .   My son , Ken junior , sends Angus his best wishes .  He says that should it come to that , an in-depth probing isn't actually as bad as it sounds once you have decided to run with it .  

 Your comrade , Ken

Reference :- Paul Murray got a few facts wrong. He appears to know his research is flawed , and uses his trademark condescending manner as dutch courage .

Reference :-   Paul Murray somehow got his facts wrong when he accused " the left " of not questioning billionaire Michael Bloomberg's suitability as Democratic presidential candidate .  And then he accidentally misled us about Bloomberg's greatest achievement as Mayor of New York .

Good morning Paul .  I tried  to find something in your Bloomberg  story that isn't total twaddle . But couldn't .  For starters numerous polls show that support for Mr Bloomberg among Democrat voters is as low as one to two percent in some parts of the country .   That happens to be because he is a billionaire .  Democrats Bernie Sanders and Elizabeth Warren have publicly expressed their concern .  And you haven't heard anything about that ?  

 How could that be, Paul ?   It must be  incompetent research otherwise it would be just plain deception .  And then you said the only thing  Mr Bloomberg achieved as Mayor of New York was limiting the size of soft drink serves at the flicks .  Did you notice the fact that the press described him as a phenomenal fiscal manager whose legacy was a 2 billion dollar surplus for the city of New York ?
 You must not have , or your soft drink line would also be deliberately dishonest , wouldn't it  ?

 Anyway , carry on Paul  . For a brief moment there , some weeks back, I thought you might have been considering running with  that  " opinions you can trust " theme . Obviously people seeking the truth are not your target audience .  My mistake .   One more thing Paul  , I am no supporter of Mr Bloomberg , but I do object to a hack journalist unfairly discrediting a man whose achievements in life should entitle him to a modicum of respect .    At least you didn't mime him masturbating , like you did with Mr Turnbull .   Do you save that for ex- prime ministers only , Paul ? 
 Come on son , smarten up you act while you still have a job . 

 
 Your disappointed comrade ,  Ken
 

Reference :- Because students protesting about climate change turned out in support of worker's rights, Chris Kenny accused them of being ideologically motivated .

Reference : - There is a Bill coming before parliament to restrict unions and give the government powers that bypass due legal process . Students are joining with workers to protest .

Well Chris, obviously the student protesters are pushing their paticular ideology . That's the whole point . They aren't happy that galloping vampire capitalism is consuming the planet .  Capeesh ?  

 Actually , I am loving these new protests.  It reminds me of the student/ worker strikes in France back in spring 1968 .   I was backpacking through Europe , and had made friends with some groovy students at the Sorbonne  University in Paris . They were heavily into free love and revolution .  Though I myself personally was not much into revolution , we still had a lot in common , and I used to hang out in the dormitories quite a lot . 

  In the end the workers and students brought France to a standstill . That French president chap with the big nose shot through to Germany and took some compassionate leave, while 10 million people went on strike . In many ways it was a symbolic event , but the workers did get a 35% raise in minimum wage and their unions were shored up more than somewhat by the time Monsieur de Gaul was back in his office .   Ah , those were heady days Chris , and I can't wait to relive them here .

  Although , I wish the protestors hadn't run with the Bee Gee's song "Stayin Alive " for their theme song .  Back in my day it was Jimi Hendrix , full of all his Vietnam War angst that we played in the dormitories at the Sorbonne .   I played an LP of Hendrix performing  " Purple Haze " to my son , Ken junior , the other night. He loved it so much that all he could say was " How long has this been going on ? "   The vinyl was a bit scratched , but somehow that only added to the Jimi Hendrix experience .  

   Your comrade , Ken .

Reference :- Sky News anchor , Chris Kenny , laughed his head off at band " Coldplay " . His spiteful laughter is never a pretty sight .

Reference :-    The band  " Cold play " has decided  to suspend all tours until they can be done sustainably .   Chris Kenny calls this blatant " virtue signalling ".

You are a tough man Chris .  You call Bono a hypocrite for traveling in jets , and Coldplay virtue signalers because they won't . Clearly there must other options of which they are unaware . Since I can't think of a single one , perhaps you could forward them your list .  I like the "arms race of virtue signalling "  headline you ran with .  It's right up there with Andy Bolt's war on China.  And Chris , do you know who is winning that arms race ?  Our very own Mr Mr Scott Morrison . He recently huffed and puffed his way  through that  " Hike for Hope  " fundraiser for aborigines .   They sure need some fundraising after the Tories cut 11 million quid from spending on education for aborigines in this year's budget .   I guess Mr Morrison , whose fingers are always on the pulse of public opinion , knows how much a saving of 45 cents per person per year means to the average voter .
My son , Ken junior , is quite a fan of Coldplay , and reckons they are doing the right thing .  It's a bit of a worry isn't it Chris ?  The trouble with your artistic types is that they are almost universally green lefties , and they have a lot of influence on our youth .   Personally I can't stand modern pop music .  I haven't bought an LP since Val Doonican released his last Christmas Album.  Now there was a gifted  musician .  

 Your comrade , Ken.

Reference :- Sky News told australian families we will be spending 449 dollars each on Christmas shopping this year , a couple of percent up from last year's effort .

Reference :-   It's time for everybody to shoulder their responsibility to buy the usual Christmas  junk.   Thousands of tons of colourful plastic from China are waiting for us in the stores , and that is just the packaging .

I am quite impressed by such a specific figure .  Why 449 dollars , and not 450 ?   It has a very " marketing "  flavour , in my view .  Anyway , good research I guess , although studies have shown that  86.52 % of all quoted statistics are unrealistically precise .  But getting back to Christmas , there sure is a lot of talk about the annual shopping spree and the retail figures .   Our leaders would like to see us spend more this year than last , pushing the annual  figure to around 53 Billion .  Apparently that will be great for the flagging economy , although some of that moola will possibly end up in China.

There hasn't been much talk about Christ , and his sacrifice , and the season of goodwill and so forth , but I am sure Mr Morrison will remind us about all that in due course .  As a devout Christian, he is probably offended by the shabby commercialisation of the most important religious event on the calendar .   My son , Ken junior , doesn't have much truck with religion  .   In fact , when I questioned him about Christmas he said it was totally copied from some Pagan festival , where there was feasting and the exchange of gifts , called Saturnalia .  I told him that he can't be right , since during Saturnalia the rich would often change places with the poor and allow the poor to live the good life for a few days .  I really can't imagine the bankers letting homeless people live on their yachts for the weekend . How would they get the smell out ?   At least it has got me off the hook with presents , since the last time I had access to 449 quid  Dame Edna Everage's husband Norm still had his  prostate  .  

  Your comrade , Ken .

Reference :- Mr Scott Morrison's "Hike for Hope " was pretty hopeless as an exercise in public relations .

Reference :-    Mr Morrison's  participation  in the " Hike For Hope " , a fundraiser for the Aboriginal community , was not quite the crowd winner he hoped for .  You might say the whole idea backfired. .
Mr Morrison sir .  There was no point risking a heart attack or incineration stomping about the bush blatantly virtue signalling .  It's usually the leftie vultures who cop flak for virtue signalling , but on this occasion you received your fair share of flak too.   Look at the comments on Sky News .  Most are very negative , Mr Morrison , sir .   The clown who came up with this botched marketing stunt should lose their job .   And another thing . These more impromptu interviews allow some of your true character to slip out from under the " good old uncle Scomo ' mask . It happened when you ignored the damage inflicted upon the gay community when gay marriage was blamed for bringing the fiery wrath of God upon us .   And blow me down , you have done it again  .  Here is the direct quote .

     "   ( Aborigines )  don't want to be seen as different , you know.  If they are working at Rio or working with Twiggy or somewhere like that , they don't want to be singled out . "

You said nothing about Aborigines participating in all sorts of occupations.    For example , we have 400 Aboriginal doctors .   It's not helpful when you give the impression that mining is all they can do . And it's not helpful when you give the impression that mining is the only industry you care about  .
 " How good is mining ! "  were the words you used to start a recent address.   You badly need to broaden your outlook .   I know you just spent 190,000 quid  with some dodgy advertising crew , learning how  to fake empathy , but  you also need to do the occasional cost/benefit analysis . 

This stunt would have lost you some racist voters , and also lost you votes from those thinking types who you had tricked on polling day .  Anyway , best put this blunder behind you . But learn from it before it's too late .    

 Your Comrade , Ken    

  P.S   Fortunately my son , Ken junior , doesn't know who Rio or Twiggy are , so I told him they were hospitals to save your bacon .  After all , the country has over 3000 aboriginal nurses .     

Reference :- Peta Credlin makes a breathtakingly untrue statement , and keeps talking .

Reference :-   Peta Credlin must have been ad libbing  when she said that unlike Westpac , Adani has committed no crime other than trying to help the poor of India get electricity . How did she get that idea ?

That was a real whopper Peta .  Since you mustn't have had time to do your homework on Adani , I enclose herewith a list of  " legal difficulties "  that Adani has had to confront.  It is by no means complete , but it suffices to paint a certain picture .

-  An Adani coalship sank off the coast of Mumbai  . Adani didn't do the cleanup.
- Adani poisoned a river in Zambia that people needed to live , and forgot to tell us .
- They are accused of using child labor , underpaying workers , and causing avoidable worker deaths
-  Half of Adani subsidiaries use accounts in the Cayman Islands , a known tax haven .
- They have been implicated in bribing customs officials and the police
- They have been accused of using bribes in their dealings with environmental agencies
- They have been accused of abusing the market to overcharge their customers .
- They were  embroiled in a scam  involving the illegal export of 7.7 million tons of ore .
- 6  Adani group companies are under investigation for lying about coal quality .
- They are under investigation for a one billion dollar fraud which exaggerated the cost of equipment
  Is that enough for you Peta ?
  No ?
 - In 2104 they were found guilty of overcharging and ordered to pay out 4.8 million
-  Fairfax Media found they had kept employees in conditions so bad some came down with cholera
-  They committed fraud that  cheated shareholders of 298 million dollars
-  They breached their license at Abbott point , resulting in  massive pollution and a fine .
-  Leaked emails  indicate they have been doing weapons deals in South Africa.
-  They were repaid 98 million in tax payers money from South Africa for duty they didn't pay .
 Is that enough now ?   You really should be confident of your facts before ad libbing .
And although the lawyers are still squabbling over many of these allegations , some have been settled , not in Adani's favour  .
  My son, Ken junior , is quite amazed by Adani's range of business activities .  He reckons the show they run reads like a short story by Damon Runyon .   His favorite quote of Runyon's is this .
 " He who tooteth not his own horn , the same shall not be tooted " .    If you could tell me what that means , I would be most grateful .  I won't ask the lad , or he will think me stupid .

Your comrade , Ken

Reference:- Peta Credlin and Andy Bolt take advantage of a moiety of our right to free speech , while it lasts.

Reference :-  Many times , Sky News has vilified environmental activists who encourage boycotts of companies they consider irresponsible .   But now , both Peta Credlin and Andy Bolt have promoted their own boycotts . 

 Hello there Andy and Peta .   I guess you are promoting boycotts just to see what it feels like before Mr Morrison brings in more laws to make them illegal . How does it feel ?  It might be like climbing Uluru before that was banned .  You might have never done it at all , but for the realisation that this could  be the last chance .  

Anyway , as a fellow boycotter , let me congratulate you .  Peta , I quite like your suggested boycotting of Westpac . What a pack of creeps . They deserve no better .  Can you see now the value of having such freedoms ?   Freedoms you would deny others , whose opinions differ from yours .  And Andy , did you enjoy damaging the business of Qantas  ( read the comments from your cult of followers ) , as punishment for revealing  they believe in climate change ?  It feels good doesn't it ?    Be aware , however , that your right to do that is on Mr Morrison's chopping block , a fact that has even caused a stir  among journalists in other countries  .  Mr Morrison appears to know as much about the law as your typical orpington , so it may not happen .  But stay alert . You wouldn't want to be dragged away by the federal police right in the middle of one of your episodes of " opinion you can trust ".   I have reproduced below a famous quote , from German Pastor Martin Niemoller , to illustrate my point .   The good Pastor , though not a Hillsong clapper , felt guilty after the second world war for not speaking out as Hitler rose to power . 

                        First they came for the Communists
                        And I did not speak out
                        Because i was not a Communist

                       Then they came for the Socialists
                       And I did not speak out
                       Because I am not a Socialist

                       Then they came for the trade unionists
                       And I did not speak out
                       Because I am not a trade unionist

                       Then they came for the Jews
                       And I did not speak out
                       Because I am not a Jew .

                      Then they came for me
                      And there was no one left
                      To speak out for me .

  My son , Ken junior , reckons you may as well just go boycott crazy while you can . If you are short of things you want to boycott , he has quiet a few suggestions.  For starters he reckons the telephone companies are ripping us off and deserve a thorough boycotting .   He says , imagine the impact on their bottom line if everybody decided to stop using their phones for a day every week ?
 Also , do you think you could run a boycott of craft beers ?   Ken junior reckons they all taste like carbonated aftershave and a schooner costs as much  as a six pack of the drinkable stuff .   There are limitless options .   Feel free to be in contact  .  Happy boycotting .

Your comrade , Ken
 



    

Reference :- My son , Ken junior , applies for a job.

Reference :-   After reading the message sent to the board of the Westpac bank by the honorable Mr Scott Morrison, Ken junior has taken the liberty of rewriting it with a dash of much needed extra verve .  But first , Mr Morrison's original message is quoted below .

"  I would like to see at this board meeting and the many board meetings that will follow a confident plan to address , firstly , the clear weaknesses they've had in their systems that have allowed this to take place , which they have identified.  And secondly , there has to be some understanding of the accountability for when these take place "

  Ken junior reckons it's not only their systems that reveal clear weaknesses .  He says he hasn't seen such a total weaselling out since his pet weasel did a runner .   He has provided below , a revised version with some extra gusto which he offers gratis .   He hopes that Mr Morrison , a man deeply concerned about  the plight of our unemployed Newstarters might view it favourably and offer him a position as a speechwriter . And perhaps , one day very  soon , he could be ghost writer for the best seller describing his standout achievements , as he steered the country towards it's first budget surplus in years , and hang  the consequences .   As Mr Morrison once said , if you give it a go , you will get a go .  Whatever that means .  So here is Ken junior's version , reproduced below in full cinemascope .

 "   I demand from this board meeting , and as many more as it takes , the total eradication of all the shifty criminal activity that you have knowingly and dishonestly concealed for years . And secondly, if you are caught committing deplorable turpitude again,  we will jam you in the slammer  faster than you can say  " multimillion dollar bonuses  " and throw the keys down one of Clive Palmer' s defunct mine shafts .  You shabby bunch  of pricks . "
 Not at all bad for a teenager .   I think Mr Morrison will be amused by it's presumption .
 Let's all wish Ken junior luck with it .  

 Your comrade , Ken

Reference :- The right honorable Mr Scott Morrison wants to fast track environmental approvals . They are stifling investment ,he says .

Reference :-   If Mr Morrison claims tough environmental regulations are damaging the economy , then surely the countries in the world with the toughest environmental laws must be near broke . But strangely , it's the countries with few environmental policies that are near broke .  This demands a closer a look .

Hello again Mr Morrison, sir.    I was going to point at the country in the world that rates highest on the World Bank's rating for ease of doing business . But it happens to be New Zealand , damn it .  They also have an excellent environmental record , damn it again .  I fully understand that there can be a bit of rivalry between close neighbours , and bugger the ANZAC tradition .  So with their Prime Minister being abused by Sky News all the time , and Jonesie telling her where she should wear her socks , it might be better to research this Sky Reply elsewhere . 

 So I thought we might look at the country with the most stringent environmental laws in the world .   It sounds scary , I know , but hang in there, sir . That country is said to be Lithuania . In that weird foreign clime , people have free access to environmental information from the government , and are allowed to challenge the government if it's decisions violate environmental rights .  It must be like having a country full of activists and no laws restricting them .  So the next question is , how do they rate with the World Bank for ease of doing business?   Well it turns out that it that they rate better than most other OECD countries , including us.   It also turns out that they have a much stronger economy , and less debt than us .  They currently run a healthy budget surplus .  You know , a surplus like that holiest of grails shining at the end of the short tunnel that marks your stint as PM .    But here's the thing I find  hardest to fathom . With all that pointless greenie legislation holding them back , they have an employment  rate in the industrial sector four times our own !   Can you believe that ?  What are they all doing for God's sake ?  Are they building lifeboats for polar bears or weaving safety nets to catch falling Walruses or what ?

My son , Ken junior  , says he wouldn't mind moving there to get a job .  But I tell him there will be jobs everywhere here soon, rebuilding the country after it has burnt to the ground .  It will be like a post war boom .  It will also be handy for wealth redistribution , if the insurance companies all cough up as they should , and pay for it all .  They will , wont they , Mr Morrison ?  We don't want another Royal Commission . Each time we run one of those it's more horrifying than the last . 

 Your comrade , Ken

Reference :- Peta Credlin wants to make us angry again . This time about the way the public service has grown outrageously in Queensland and Victoria . Both Labor states .

Reference :-   Peta Credlin  waved a " report " at us which apparently reveals that the Queensland government employs 100,000 more public servants now than it did 5 years ago.   She neglected to tell us the source of the report , which is  shame , since it doesn't coincide with figures on the government website .

Good morning from Queensland Peta .   And good morning to your fellow anchor Rita Panahi too . I see you have interviewed her  again . Sky News seems to spend a lot of time interviewing it's own reporters .  Be careful, or you might end up working in an echo chamber where the only opinions you hear are your own .   When you get a moment , could you flick me the reference for that piece of paper you waved ?   I have searched high and low and can't find where 100, 000 new leeches on the public purse are hiding .   

Did you notice that both Queensland and Victoria have the fastest population growth in the country ?  By a big margin too . I guess that might explain the need for more health practitioners and teachers and so on , which is where the increase in staff has mostly occurred .   But your figure still seems a tad inflated . By tad I mean over 70,000.   I hope you weren't  relying on Angus Taylor for your statistics . He made a right royal stuff up with that figure he quoted for the Sydney Council's  annual travel bill .
 It is a mystery to me the way all the economists  running the LNP  keep getting their figures wrong. Thank heavens that isn't reflected in the overall health of the economy , is all I can say .
 By the way , my son Ken junior sends his regards . Also , he was wondering what ever happened to that story about the asylum seeker who injected palm oil into ....himself  .  He is disappointed that the story has vanished from the air so soon  , and can't stop wondering if it will come up again .

Your comrade , Ken

Reference :- In this post we discuss the Vancouver real estate crisis . There is much to be learned from it .

Reference :-   Renowned economist ,  Professor Michael Hudson , recently gave a lecture in which he discussed the real estate crisis in Vancouver.   During this lecture he briefly used Australia to illustrate how overpriced real estate damages a country's economy .  I have reproduced the relevant part of his lecture below .   The spoken word often doesn't convert to the written seamlessly , which you will notice .  But the quote is pretty much verbatim .

 " Real estate booms are a kind of curse . In Australia the price of having a house has gone up so high that Australia is unable to be a manufacturing centre.  It is unable to produce goods and services because if you can afford to pay for a home to live in Australia , you have to earn such a high income that your employer cannot compete with exporters in other countries.    I discussed this in Canberra with the head of the central bank  (  The RBA )   and he said  ( paraphrasing )   ' Well we really don't need industry.  We actually don't need 90% of our population because we are very fortunate. We live in a nice neighborhood , the neighborhood of China , and they are buying our iron ore and our other mining stuff and we can balance our payments, and pay the banks, really without industry at all. '
And I said  ' Well what's going to happen to the Australians ? '
And he said  '  I guess you can say that's not in the equation .' "
(At this point the Vancouver audience laughs  . )
Professor Hudson then goes on to say  " And I guess it's not in the equations of economists here in Vancouver when they say Vancouver must be getting rich because of the rising house prices .  They don't see that rising house prices are making the economy poor. " 
  I wonder if we are in Mr Morrison's equations ?     My son , Ken junior , didn't want a thing to do with this post .   He is cheesed  off because he thinks he will never be able to afford a house .  And also cheesed off that he can't get a job , what with the state of the economy and all.   I cheered him up by reminding him he is at least making a few quid selling his herb cookies.  Then we ate a couple and had a good old giggle about it all .   I quite like the lad sometimes .    

Your comrade,  Ken   

 

Reference :- Although they deny it , the evidence does suggest that the Chinese might be trading in human body parts .

Reference :-  Andy Bolt enjoys the opportunity to call the Chinese "barbaric "  for trading in human body parts .  If it is happening , it certainly does sound barbaric . That could never happen in the democratic west . Or could it ?

 Andy, when you declared war on china the other day , you weren't kidding . You are sticking it to those Chinese at every opportunity .  On this occasion , although the Chinese deny the accusation , there is evidence to suggest they are up to no good .  However , one can't help but get the impression that you are more interested in attacking the Chinese regime , than exposing the plight of the alleged victims . Much of your journalism does have  that flavour .  

 Anyway , since your general point is that we would never trade in body parts in the democratic west,  I thought you might find the following of interest .   Some time back , Forbes magazine was happy to publish an article by economist Abigail Hall .  Forbes magazine is targeted at the very very rich , that is why they love to publish their annual list showing who is the most cashed up .  Young Abigail wrote quite a detailed article in which she suggested that poor people  should be allowed to sell their organs to rich people . She even did a cost/benefit analysis , based on the donor receiving  1% of the selling price of their organ .  She thought that was a fair thing , since for a poor person, this would still be a princely sum .  The investment opportunities are apparently immense .  The last I looked ,  close to 50,000 ( presumably rich ) people had viewed the article.   Here in the antipodes , an article by Rafi Letzter has been published supporting  the very same proposition  .    Rafi is a science journalist , but his article was published by "Business Insider Australia" , not a science magazine .      That's the sort of thing  galloping global vampire capitalism and breathtaking inequality tends to produce.   My son , Ken junior finds it all quite frightening . He says old blokes like you and me have worn our organs out , so nobody would want them , and besides we will both be dead soon anyway.   He , by contrast , is a callow youth,  bristling with rude health , and wants to keep his organs in his own hands .   But who knows what the future holds ? 

 Your comrade , Ken  .  
   

Reference :- The Sky Reply announces a future post .

Reference :-    The Sky Reply  has stumbled across a statement in an interview  by highly regarded economics professor  Michael Hudson that addresses the issue of Australia's decline in the manufacturing sector . 

When time permits , we will reproduce the quote , which is very thought provoking .  Especially when he describes what he was told by the Governor of the Reserve bank of Australia  .  The Sky Reply is written  using the I.T. equivalent of a thumbnail dipped in tar , which is why the numerous punctuation errors always appear , which I am unable to correct .  It will take some time to convert the spoken word into the written,   and add the post . I will need Ken junior's help .
Hopefully it will appear soon , however .  

You comrade , Ken

Reference :- The honorable Mr Scott Morrison championed deregulation to save the economy .

Reference :-    It seems deregulation is what we need to save the economy which is apparently tangled in a web of bureaucratic tape  redder than a baboon's derriere  . ( If they aren't yet extinct . )

Mr Morrison , sir . As a university graduate you doubtless understand the importance of making policy decisions  based on empirical evidence .   Can you direct me to a source that supports the notion that deregulation does anything other than ruin economies while making the elite richer than Croesus ?     You know , think of the Global Financial Crisis that followed deregulation of the financial sector, for example .    If you like , I can direct you to a vast number of sources that reveal  deregulation as the cause of economic disasters .   

 How's it going with the banks today , by the way ?   It appears that they didn't comply with regulations . Tut tut , but probably just an oversight .   You seem a bit tetchy about the impact of environmental approvals on development , and mining in particular , if that counts as development .   Do we have such a great record with handling the environment that there is no need to bother about detailed impact studies before the bulldozers are  cranked up ?     The Great Barrier Reef , the Murray river system , the polluted sites we have to address when a mining company has done a runner ,  and the current state of our national parks and farmland  don't  inspire confidence .   And what was that about freeing up worker's  award compliance for companies ?    Haven't wages been stagnant for years , or is it just my wage  ?

Here's  a peculiar thing .  Our governments love inflicting new regulations on the average citizen . You can't eat here , you can't smoke there , you can't come in without scanning your ID , you have to wear a helmet or vest , you need police clearance , you can't drink spirits now , you cant play music at that nightclub ,  you can't say this or that ,  you can only have a plastic cup for your beer  and on and bloody on .  It has actually damaged  our tourism industry .  We are known overseas as " the land of bland . "  Greg Sheridan  , political editor of the Australian calls us  " the most restrictive , secretive , antidemocratic jurisdiction in the advanced world "    Yet big business and the financial sector get free rein .   My son , Ken junior ,   though precocious at times ,  has made this observation .  He says Australia's  governments , at all levels , are like the prefects at his rich mates's school .   They are a privileged group who are supposed to help the school run smoothly  .  But since they are scared witless of the school bullies , they never deal with them , and compensate for feeling worthless and gutless by handing detentions to the regular students for having one sock down , or a crooked tie .    He reckons they need to nut up and do their job properly .  

   Your comrade , Ken

Reference : - Andy Bolt complained that authorities reporting on fires use hyperbole to try and alarm us .

Reference : -   Andy Bolt accused various authorities of deliberately trying to sway public opinion about climate change by using alarming language  to describe the few little grass fires we are experiencing this season .


 For heaven's sake Andy . Talk about the pot calling the kettle black !   There is a cheap shot you almost always use to verbally defile those whose views you don't share .  .  You call them " hypocrites '.   I consulted several  sources  looking for a word that means  "  A person who is hypocritical about being a hypocrite .  Though there is obviously a pressing need for such a moniker in our  lexicon ,  I couldn't find such a word .     My son,  Ken junior , is still rolling about on the sofa laughing like Cartman out of South Park , as he scrolls though the full list of your recent headlines .  It's hard for me to hear them as he calls them out , he is laughing so much .    Out of his babble the following words have thus far been discernible .     "   Australia's war with China has begun .... this may be the start of  a revolution ....toxic femininity does cause death and damage ....  train wreck interview.... insane haters .... the destroy Australia
movement ......Nazi blah blah... ABC agenda to undermine the cohesion of the nation ... and on and on .

Please excuse the poor sentence structure , Ken junior's hysterical laughter is very distracting .
Anyway Andy , personally , I myself would never use hyperbole in a million billion years ,  but how about this for an idea ?   Ken junior has come up with a new word for somebody who is a hypocrite about being hypocritical.      He favours the word  "  andibolt "   .  Nor bad , is it ?   It would be used in a sentence thusly  .  " That news anchor  is a complete and utter andibolt .  "  Has a good ring to it , don't you think ?    As a tribute , he is prepared to allow you the privilege  of being first on the blower to the professors in Oxford who roneo off the dictionary each annum.  .    In return , a brief footnote stating he thought of it first , is all he asks . 

 Your comrade , Ken

Reference :- Westpac has been accused of breaching anti -money laundering legislation . Our Prime Minister is appalled . Again .

Reference :-    Mr Scott Morrison has had a difficult time with the financial sector over the years . You would think that,  as a man with an economics degree ,he would feel quite comfortable dealing with the banks , but he claims to be "appalled ".   He has been appalled before , but for a very different reason .

 Mr Morrison sir , you are clearly quite shocked to hear  that Westpac has been accused of non compliance with anti-money laundering legislation.   And 23 million times too .  That is going to be hard to sweep under the silk rug .  And so hot on the heels of the multi billion dollar customer ripoff
revealed by the Banking Royal Commission .  I guess they sound like big numbers to humble folk like me , but these bankers talk in millions when they are merely adjusting their annual bonuses , so perhaps 23 million breaches doesn't sound like such a big deal to them . 

  Anyway , Mr Morrison , do you recall the last time you were appalled by a situation involving the banks?      It was when you were .... what did they say  ?  Oh yes ,  " dragged kicking and screaming  "  to approve the Banking Royal Commission .   Remember now ?    You were appalled then too, by " the populist whinge that threatens to undermine a key pillar of the Australian economy " .    You were appalled then , by the " recklessness that would undermine confidence in the banking and finance system ".
 You were appalled then by the request for a royal commission .  You called it " a stunt " and "hot air ".
 Hot air certainly seems to be accompanying your little stint as PM , in many ways .

 So after voting against the Banking Royal Commission 26 times , my son , Ken junior, wants to know if you feel a bit stupid .  I have told him you must feel a bit stupid for trusting the banks , since otherwise you would be complicit in concealing fraud .   As a sort of economist yourself , you might appreciate Ken junior's current financial setup.  .  He definitely doesn't trust the banks , and keeps his cash under his  mattress .
The proposed cash ban laws that you have waiting in the wings might not suit him , but I won't worry him about them until they happen .   The lad has quite a hoard too, since  he has a neat little money spinner going .  He grows some sort of herb under the tank stand and bakes the leaves into cookies to sell at the local pub.    They sell like mad . My mate Trevor and I tried a couple , and they tasted so terrible we had to laugh .  In fact we laughed all night , even the moon looked silly that night for some reason .    Anyway , with those 23 million breaches , it will take too long to individually address them , though the fines will be massive .  Why not  write off the fines , nationalize Westpac , and  offer the directors immunity to prosecution if they take a pay cut of a few million ?    That might make the other banks lift their game . 

  Your comrade , Ken .

Reference :- Andy Bolt told us that the majority of Australians don't believe in climate change .

Reference :-     Apparently Andy Bolt has access to polls that show only a handful of leftie vultures believe the climate is changing .  But where are these polls ?   Sky News anchors have a penchant for telling us what we think about a number of social issues . But where is their evidence for what we think ? 

 Sorry Andy , I have searched high and low , and can't find a single poll that shows the majority of Australians are not concerned about climate change . You will have to forward me some references . From what I have uncovered , it appears that climate change is quite the flavour of the month in most circles .  Excluding , of course , coal lobbyists . 

 Even the big business magnates are talking about climate change now , as gnashing  their teeth , they watch their profits fall and their insurance costs  escalate .   But good on you for staying positive .  Sadly the overwhelming evidence supporting climate change is molding public opinion .  That's the annoying thing about overwhelming evidence .   While you are sorting through all those references proving your assertion , could you have a gander at the latest poll from The Lowy Institute ?   Have you heard of it ?   Its a right wing think tank run by a number of company directors and  former conservative political figures  , so I am sure you have .    Their recent poll asking people what they considered to be the greatest threat to our future showed  " climate change "  topping the list .  Furthermore ,  around two thirds of respondents  agreed  " we should take steps now even if it involves significant costs"  .     I am no great fan of the Lowy Institute , so I look forward to watching you discredit their poll with your trademark vicious rant .   

 My son , Ken junior , reckons those rants  are the funniest thing on the tele , so let us know when you are ready to let rip and we will crack open the popcorn .   

  Your comrade , Ken

Reference :- Andy ( I am not a racist ) Bolt felt entitled to pillory Aboriginal author , Mr Bruce Pascoe for his book Dark Emu .

Reference :-    Andy Bolt delved deep into author,  Mr Bruce Pascoe's , genealogy and discovered  no evidence of his Aboriginality .  Excited by this finding , he then dissected  Mr Pascoe's book " Dark Emu " and found it full of favorable descriptions of Aboriginal history  .

 Ah well , Andy , we all like to view the history of our own mob through rose coloured glasses.  You could say the same of the British Empire , and any culture you care to name .  I just can't fathom your purpose  here .    We destroyed Aboriginal society centuries ago , so do you need to keep rubbing it in ?  

  Andy , I reckon we all practice some kind of amateur psychology ,  including psychologists .   So what do you think of this ?    Perhaps it makes you feel less guilty about cruelly destroying something if you subsequently convince yourself it was worthless in the first place ? 

 That would be a useful self deception . It would assuage guilt .   Self deception can be very useful in other ways .  For example , a chap might develop, or even feign , an interest in sophisticated pursuits in order to mask a sense of inferiority . A chap of humble immigrant descent with little formal education might loudly display an interest in opera and fine liquor , for example .    He is only kidding himself of course, but is there any harm in that ? 

But Andy , what I can't understand is why Mr Pascoe would pretend to be an Aborigine ?    You don't see many first nation folk sipping fine whiskey in the halls of power , do you ?     He is white enough to embellish his credentials as he pleases , so it beats me .  Perhaps he is just one of those chaps who deep down actually likes himself ? 

Anyway ,  one of the young lads at  The Sky Reply , Gabbo ,  is quite a talented musician .   In fact he is just talented generally .   His band is playing in Kooralya on the weekend , and you should hear his fusion of didgeridoo and electric guitar , it is amazing .   I know you prefer Wagner , but  Gabbo  might broaden your  musical horizons .  My son , Ken junior , will be on drums .  He wasn't very good at first , but Gabbo showed him some techniques and he has greatly improved . 

 Gabbo's band is raising money for the firefighters , so if you buy a ticket you will be supporting a good cause .    Think about it Andy, and let us know . 

Your comrade , Ken 

P.S.    We will be serving beer , but you will have to bring your own whiskey .

 



    

Reference :- Paul Murray feigned masturbation on prime time television . A tricky thing to explain to my 10 year old niece .

Reference :-    In this age of extreme political correctness , Paul Murray got away with pretending to masturbate on prime time television .   He was also pretending to be former Prime Minister , Mr Malcolm Turnbull, at the same time .  I thought that both public masturbation and impersonating a prime minister were criminal offenses ?   Although, I guess Mr Morrison is pretending to be a Prime Minister at the moment,  and the Feds have left him alone .

 Apparently that was nice wrist action Paul.  You did mention that your wrist is sore . Too much practice can do that .
 Congratulations for removing another antiquated taboo .   Do you think you could give me an explanation for your hand gesture that might satisfy my ten year old niece ?   I told her it represented a billiards player polishing his cue , but she seems unconvinced .  Paul, it is probably OK for me to write a cheeky , disrespectful blog .  It has to be deliberately accessed and read .  But feigning wanking on prime time television is likely to cause upset or offense .  Elderly people like myself , for example , who grew up when different social standards  prevailed .  You know, those old fashioned notions of politeness and respect . Perhaps once we are all dead you can let rip in your own balmy world .  Meanwhile you should mind your bloody manners , young man .

   Finally , my son Ken junior , the troubled teenager , wants to know if Peta Credlin plans to feign masturbation anytime soon . He also says he was quite impressed by your wrist action .  Perhaps it is impressive , I wouldn't know .   But be assured , your metaphorical wanking is right up there with the very best .   

Your comrade , Ken  P.S.    If standards of behavior among men down in the big smoke are similar to those here in the bush  , I wouldn't frequent  Mr Turnbull's  favorite watering hole  . He might knock your block off.      

Reference :- Peta Credlin informed us that our tax dollars are being used to treat an Iranian asylum seeker's membrum virile following a self harm incident .

Reference  :-    This story has the works .  Queue jumping asylum seeker , taxpayer dollars , controversial medevac laws , privacy violation , media manipulation , deceitful politics , and best of all.... a foreign gentleman's wing wang .

Top of the morning to you Peta .  Indeed, as you say , why would a healthy male inject palm oil into his joystick ?   Apparently it is a popular pastime in that part of the world .  Hundreds of would be casanovas have found themselves in hospital, or the morgue, after pumping palm oil into their peckers .  So what was the motivation ?  

  Personally ,  I am running with the notion that he was depressed and going mad after 6yrs of detention in a tropical gulag with no hope of release .   I mean , if you were going to deliberately self  harm to exploit the medevac laws,  why puncture  your  pocket rocket when you could chew soap and fake epileptic fits instead ?   And what of this media leak that  has deprived the chap of all privacy ?   This is not the sort of medical emergency that a man enjoys seeing plastered across the front pages .  In fact , is such a disclosure of a patient's sensitive medical history even legal ?   The right honorable Mr Peter Dutton could have intervened but didn't .  Perhaps the media frenzy suits his purposes . After all, parliament is about to vote on the abolition of  the medevac laws and this story couldn't have surfaced at a better time .    

There have been 93 public submissions in favour of the medevac laws , and only 2 against . Clearly there is a need to steer public opinion in the direction of government policy , and there is nothing quite like a foreign fellow's phallus to prick everybody's ears .      Lastly Peta , I wouldn't worry too much about that ten grand spent on dingle debridement   .   Our offshore gulag system has cost taxpayers around 5 billion so far ,and it has only bought us deaths , suicides , mental illness , and hatred .  All provided for us at inflated prices by private companies  with the bona fides of a crack peddler .  Meanwhile more than a thousand asylum seekers arrive each month by air .  

  Before closing , my son , Ken junior , has taken quite an interest in this incident .  He has heard that palm oil injections sometimes do work and wants to know more . You know what boys are like at his age .  If you have access to more information in that regard he would be most appreciative .  Personally I think it's about time he simply hardened up .   The lad is also worried that you could be placing yourself at risk of litigation by contravening medical privacy laws .   If that is the case, perhaps you should consider pulling the story .  

 Your comrade ,  Ken 

Reference :- Prime Minister of the moment , Mr Scott Morrison, accused sacked footy player Israel Folau of " appalling insensitivity ". Something seldom associated with the sport .

Reference :-       Sacked footy star Israel Folau gave a moving oration in which he explained , among other things , that gay marriage had brought upon us the wrath of the almighty .  Apparently our God of love is punishing us , even the innocent , with drought . And for added emphasis , God  is also burning vast tracts of the scenery and incinerating our hard won goods and chattels .  We should heed this gentle warning to restrict our repertoire of sexual expression .

Mr Morrison  sir ,  you did the right thing by calling out this " appalling insensitivity ".   Personally I would have called his sermon barking mad , but let's not quibble .  However,  after the call , you then raised the ante with your own appalling insensitivity .  Allow me to briefly explain .   You  lamented the " grievous effect "  on house owners who suffered from the fires , and on fellow Christians who didn't share his views.   Can you think of anybody you may have overlooked ?  Nobody comes to mind ?
 Well , how about the entire gay community , Mr Morrison ?   They had been  told that they had  disobeyed God's laws , and that the fires and droughts are their fault.   That kind of scapegoating  can badly damage a person's standing within the community.   Yet they received no sympathy from you for this disgusting  accusation .  They are clearly far from your thoughts .  Then again , since you are a fully paid up Christian yourself and believe in  divine intervention  , perhaps it was no oversight ?  My son , Ken junior , reckons you left the gay community out for fear of encouraging more bushfires .   If so , you were very generous to put aside your own public image for the common good .  In which case ,  keep it up.  

 Your comrade , Ken 

Reference :- Ken junior made an interesting point .

Reference :-   There has been a lot of discussion regarding the visas that two of our more vocal politicians need to visit China . The Chinese authorities are currently refusing to grant these visas.

 Ken junior has made an interesting point. After all the carry on , says Ken junior , imagine this scenario.   Suddenly Beijing  agrees to issue their visas . Permanent ones .  By way of apology , the People's Liberation Army offers to fly them to China free of charge in one of their  Xian Y20 transport jets .  Furthermore , since Mr Hastie and Mr Patterson  wish to conduct a study tour , for the purpose of  their own education ,  Chinese authorities offer them the opportunity to inspect their reeducation facilities in Xinjiang .  They almost insist upon an extended stay, with all vittles and accommodation provided gratis . 

   Should such a generous offer be accepted ?   If there was a slight misunderstanding due to some excessive loudmouthing , or perhaps someone  unfavourably assessing their links with Australian intelligence bureaucracies ,  could they rely on Mr Morrison to smooth things over and get them safely home ?   Hmmmmm......      I reckon those young Tories should consider it a blessing that they didn't make it to China , and simply  "bi zui " .   ( Mandarin for "shut up" and , coincidentally ,   " incarcerate ". )     In the event that they embark upon their study tour regardless , Ken junior suggests they invest in lifetime travel insurance . 

  Your comrade , Ken

Reference :- Chris Kenny was shocked that Australian politicians Andrew Hastie and James Patterson were refused visas to visit China for a " study tour ".

Reference :-  Why would the Chinese authorities not grant visas to a couple of harmless aussie politicians who probably just want to study the evolution of Ming dynasty ceramics ?   Perhaps they have legitimate concerns ?

 Personally  Chris , James and Andrew strike me as an irritating , opinionated pair of young right wing twats.  But  should that mean they are denied a visa ?  Usually authorities will deny visas to people who they feel could be a genuine security risk . So let's look at these young chaps more closely .  

  James Patterson chairs the parliamentary joint committee on security and intelligence .  I think intelligence is occasionally connected with spying .  Andrew Hastie has held the position of captain in the Australian Army , where he was an operations officer supporting intelligence.  There's that spying thing again .   So would our own country open its doors to a couple of  similarly credentialed Chinese visitors on a " study tour ".     I suggest not .  Australian authorities are quite tight fisted when it comes to handing out visas.  Especially if they don't like the cut of your ideological jib .   A few weeks back , Berlin based award winning journalist Mimi Mefo  was refused a visa to come to Australia to speak about censorship and freedom of the press at a Griffith University conference .    Veteran journalist  Kerry O'Brien was appalled .   Australia has slid down the list to 21st , two behind Uruguay, in our freedom of the press world ranking . I guess our authorities didn't want her mentioning this uncomfortable fact in her lecture .   Chinese authorities  asking a couple of unrepentant loudmouths ,who compare them with Nazis , to be polite  before they can have a visa, (which they are still prepared to issue ) , seems pretty mild  by comparison .  Don't you reckon , Chris ?    

 Your comrade , Ken
 

Reference :- The Sky Reply begs your patience with a lengthy response to Rowan Dean's "Outsiders "weather report . And requests that you pass it on .

Reference :-   It's annoyingly dull , but like those horror movie monsters who keep getting up when you thought they were dead , Rowan Dean keeps returning with his godawful weather report claiming to prove climate change is a hoax .  We apologise for the length of this post , but will try to keep it entertaining .

Alright , Rowan , are you ready ?  But before we begin , I see you took my advice about concealing your tumescence , and wore a suitably loose and dark coloured jacket .  Stooping also helped , so well done . Ah yes , record cold , and record snow in the northern hemisphere . What fun .   I did like the way you played a couple of songs  from the seventies praising the now non existent Autumn . It lightens things up a bit , but I don't quite understand how record low temperatures and the entire season of Autumn cashing in it's chips and vacating the planet proves there is no climate change .  Anyway , did we really need to have an Autumn ?  It served no useful purpose as far as I can see.    My son , Ken junior ,  annoyingly watching as I write,  just told  me that's what I said when there was a part left over after I fixed his trail bike , and when he rode it  the engine fell out .  He's a strange lad , and for the life of me I can't see the connection.   Anyway , since there is undoubtedly climate change with all this freezing cold and an entire season torn out of the calendar , the question remains ... Is it , overall , getting hotter or colder globally ?    Scientists say it is getting hotter , and if they are correct , there must be places experiencing  record heat , to balance out the record cold . And , ahem , there do appear to be a few such places .   

 South Eastern USA ...... record heatwave  this year .
Japan  ..... highest temperature ever recorded during heatwaves in Hokkaido
Indo -Pakistan ...... many died in staggering 50.8 degrees heat
Europe ............An unprecedented three major heatwaves with 5 countries experiencing record heat .
 Alaska ......record heat wave with temperatures 14.5 degrees higher than the previous record in 2014.
and on and on and on ...........
So then, Rowan .   About this record winter that's stirring your loins .    Heat waves in the arctic  this year produced the highest temperature ever recorded within the arctic circle .  This hot air disturbs the circular winds that form a stockade around the polar region confining the freezing air . And it spills south . Climate scientists have been telling us we would experience record cold spells  due to global warming for years .   Ken junior tells  me I am wasting my time explaining all this . He can be quite rude at times and just snapped  "  Don't waste your time on that Rowan Dean , the man has the brains of a sea cucumber ."
The cheeky bastard .   Finally , to follow your lead with those lovely songs , I leave you with this inspiring poem by the very aptly named Robert Frost .

                                                         Fire and Ice    
                                     Some say the world will end in fire
                                     Some say in ice
                                     From what I have tasted of desire
                                     I hold with those who favour fire
                                     But if it had to perish twice
                                     I think I know enough of hate
                                     To say that for destruction ice
                                     Is also great
                                     And would suffice

Robert Frost was born in 1874 .
He certainly had more brains than a sea cucumber .    Your comrade , Ken



      

 

Reference :- Mr Morrison explained that now is not the time to be discussing climate change .

Reference :-  According to Mr Scott Morrison , now is not the time to discuss climate change . Apparently it is insensitive to broach the subject while the fires blaze .

Good morning, Mr Morrison , sir .  I understand your position entirely . If we start enacting policies to confront  this so called " climate change " too soon , in a few months when the unprecedented bush fire season ends , people might get the mistaken impression that acting on climate change had helped .  That might lock in public opinion .  Already 76% of Australians believe there is climate change , and you need to get that well below 50%  before the next election . You owe it to your coal mining amigos  , as well as your chances of re-election .  

Anyway , everybody here is most appreciative of your offered prayers . Our local firefighting resources have had so many funding cuts they couldn't cope with a burning BBQ plate , so thank you for offering something so constructive .   We are quite happy to defer to your marketing experience as regards the appropriate time to tackle the supposed climate change issue .   Finally , perhaps you could offer  me some advice ?    My son , Ken junior , had a penchant  for thrashing the guts out of my  ute .  He recently wrote it off , crashing into the neighbour's dunny .  That got him in the poo , literally and figuratively .  Anyway , though I had been telling him for ages he would end up pranging if he drove like a maniac , it didn't seem to be a good idea to bring up the subject immediately post accident .    But then , can you tell me ,when will  be the right time ?  If you could help me with that , I would be forever grateful.   Mr Howard didn't waste time bringing in the gun laws after the Port Arthur massacre , and that certainly worked a treat .  But that was a simpler  situation , I guess .   No stroppy teenagers or coal lobbyists involved . 

  Looking forward to your reply . Your Comrade , Ken        

Reference :- Barnaby Joyce finally admitted there is climate change , but his meticulous scientific research has revealed that a major cause is fluctuations in the Sun's magnetic field .

Reference :-    Defying well known climate expert and  universally loved  Prime Minister ,  Mr Scott Morrison ,  Mr Barnaby Joyce admits that climate change is real . However , he says , changes in the magnetic field of the Sun could account for global warming , rather than the burning of fossil fuels .

Well Barnaby , I couldn't find a credible scientist who thinks the Sun's magnetic field has a thing to do with climate change , though since you said so , they must exist .   You should have referenced the many peer reviewed articles you have no doubt studied .   And here's another thing .  Microwaves are electromagnetic radiation . They heat up food in microwave ovens .  Maybe the microwaves juicing up our mobile phones and communications are heating the planet ?  Perhaps if everybody went off the air for a few days the planet would cool .   It's worth a try at least , and if you stopped the bush fires you would be PM in a flash .  Since I thought of it first , could you help me out with my son Ken junior ?   He has been job hunting for some time now, with no luck . Perhaps you could get him a job working for you as a research assistant .  You wouldn't believe how good he is at making things up.   The other day I accused him of  driving the ute without my permission since  the petrol was all gone . He said it was evaporation because of the heat .  I pointed out that the odometer had gone up by 500klms and he said I must have mistaken an" 8 " for a " 3 " due to the smoke from the fires .  .  The lad sure is quick with his footwork  , and would be a great asset .   

Your comrade , Ken

Reference : - Peta Credlin discovers that " activists" are trying to change society . Who would have thought ?

Reference :-   Peta Credlin , a great supporter of the Hong Kong protests , rather unpatriotically , doesn't like our own home grown activists .  Apparently they have a hidden agendum .

Gosh Peta , why are you surprised that climate activists want to change the fundamentals of society ?
Isn't that pretty well the definition of activism ?   I mean , why else would they be demonstrating ?  Just so we can laugh at them on the television set or let shock jocks ridicule them on the wireless ?  

 My son , Ken junior , is a keen activist , and so committed that he spends all of his allowance on superglue and donations to Greenpeace .  That costs me , of course , when the little reprobate has no money for anything else , but I do like seeing him motivated by something . Recently , he introduced me to a web site where I could  check out how many planet earths it would take to support my own lifestyle if everybody in the world lived like me .   Jeez Peta , I am at best a humble chap . (No air conditioning , one old ute , grow a few veges , never travel in foreign climes ,  buy my clothes at St Vinnies , have a few orpingtons for eggs . )  But blow me down if it would take 5 planet earths for everybody to live like me !  

 Ken junior and I use our  entire per annum's worth of sustainable resources by March  each year.   I guess everything for the rest of the year represents environmental decline .   So Peta , these activists are actually genuinely wanting to change all of society, not simply shut down coal mines .   And it is not in the least subversive . They say it out loud and to your face .  What they want is an end to galloping  global vampire capitalism .  I hope that removes any confusion .  Politics is full of treachery and hidden agenda , lies and distractions .  But these activists are playing a straight bat .  Anyway , Peta , if you would like to look up your own ecological footprint on the biocapacity of the planet ,  the web site is called " Long Term Economy "  .  It sounds like something a banker would consult , but it is in fact a site dedicated to the natural" economy "of the world , not the destructive human economy currently stuffing the planet.   Ken junior reckons a celebrity like yourself might be up in the two digits ,  around 13 planet earths .    Let me know if he is wrong , I do enjoy the occasional opportunity to correct the little smart arse .

Your comrade , Ken
  
 

Reference :- Andy Bolt warned us about Jeremy Corbyn's anti-semitism . The problem is , Jeremy is not actually anti-semitic .

Reference : -   Those who have a vested interest in discrediting Jeremy Corbyn ahead of the British election are accusing him of being anti-semitic . It's certainly an easy way to damage the man's reputation . But it happens to be untrue .   Andy's research is lacking yet again .

Wrong again Andy .    And this is a very serious thing to be wrong about .  Indeed Jeremy does sympathise with the plight of the Palestinians , as do a great many thinking people including such luminaries as Noam Chomsky and Chris Hedges .  But this doesn't mean that he is anti-semitic .  There have been several attempts to paint him as anti-semitic over the years .  All subsequently revealed to be baseless, and all politically motivated .  One famously included the use of the "f " word by a female Corbyn  hater  , Margaret Hodge , in the House of Commons.   Tut tut Margaret !   And  these shabby misrepresentations keep resurfacing , since they are useful weapons for  Corbyn's opponents .

So Andy , let's go straight to some horses' mouths to clarify the situation .
A Parliamentary Committee , with a strong bias against  Corbyn reached the following conclusion .
 "  There is no convincing or reliable evidence to support a higher prevalence of anti-semitic attitudes within Labour than any other political party "
Human rights advocacy group " Liberty "  concluded .
"   Labour is not overun by anti-semitism , islamaphobia , or other forms of racism . "
And more revealing still, British Jewish historian Geoffrey Alderman , an orthodox Jew ,  who himself dislikes Corbyn's pro Palestinian outlook , has stated .
 " Corbyn has an impressive , demonstrable record of supporting Jewish communal initiatives."
So you are completely wrong Andy .  The far right , as it flounders in the cesspool of it's own creation is clutching at straws . Once the far right was the domain of the anti-semite , but now they accuse the left of the same racism in the hope of scoring political points . It is a tactic born of desperation .
Do you know the author Howard Jacobsen, who writes for the New York Times ?   He completely fabricated a story claiming Holocaust denial was supported at the 2017 UK Labour conference . That was no little fib . It was one very big poisonous porkie .
You shouldn't be in the business of selling your audience pork pies Andy.   My son , Ken junior , the rabid socialist  , was quite alarmed when he heard your accusations .  We can thank him for doing the research that set us straight .   We  like to fight fairly , and discuss real policies rather than use lies to  fear monger , don't we Andy ?  

   Your comrade , Ken