Reference :- Numbers count .

Reference :-    Quoting numbers in Parliament is very risky.  Embarrassing mistakes can be made . Fortunately we have the likes of Ms Sharri Markson at News 24 ( formerly Sky News ) to correct any misleading errors .  

 Dear Sharri , 

                   Well done young lady , well done !  I was initially shocked by Senator Penny Wong's claim , at a United Nations meeting , that 15,000 children had been displaced from their homes in the West Bank so far this year .  Of course , not many of them had seen family members murdered ,  probably a mere handful . Nonetheless ,  and call me old-fashioned if you like , that did seem like an alarming number of traumatised children . We all have our limits , don't we ? 

Thankfully  , it seems that I had been needlessly alarmed , since you have informed us that Senator Wong's figure was completely wrong . Apparently it has taken 18 months , not the quoted 6 months , to drive  15,000 children from their homes . This clearly paints an entirely different picture .  As your comrade Paul Murray would wisely state  " Nothing to see here ." . 

Senator Wong should hang her anti-semitic head in shame .

Anyway , since The Sky Reply has been off line for a few months following  legal action , I know you will appreciate an update on events here in Kooralya . 

Ken junior just bought a cheap oil  painting at the local school jumble sale . It is a particularly hideous portrait of Charles Manson . Nobody wanted it , but Ken junior was shrewd enough to notice that it has a rather convincing fake ivory frame . Once he has removed the existing portrait , which is getting old and faded anyway , he will be able to place a portrait of anybody he pleases in the ersatz  frame . Pretty cool idea I reckon . 

 And in other news , our local publican discovered that Trevor , the barman , had stolen 15  thousand  quid from the cash register over the past 6 months , and fired him .  Further investigations revealed that it had taken Trevor almost 18 months to steal the 15 thousand quid . Naturally Trevor  received a full apology and has been reinstated .   After all , pilfering from the cash register is seen as completely acceptable ,  provided one is not greedy and does the stealing slowly and steadily . 

Rather like ethnic cleansing  , Hey Sharri  . 

Your comrade , 

Ken  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

  

Reference:- The Prime Minister of Israel , Mr Netanyahu , has done the right thing ......ish .

 Reference :-  The video released by Israeli Minister of National Security , Mr Gvir , has been condemned by Mr Netanyahu .......sort of .....

Dear Mr Netanyahu , 

                                    Well done sir !  The international outrage caused by that video showing  Mr Gvir abusing those Flotilla folk required your immediate response , and you have done the right thing .   Diplomacy is your forte , and we can all learn much by observing the way you handle delicate situations . 

Mr Gvir has aggressively defended  his little " selfie " in a recent speech to the Knesset . Thankfully that speech was made behind closed doors , as far as the western mainstream media are concerned , so no harm done . 

 I guess you can't punish Mr Gvir , since you need his political support .

Not like that IDF lawyer , Maj Gen Yifat Tomer -Yerushalmi I think it was , who released video footage of a Palestinian prisoner being raped . I don't imagine she will be freed from house arrest soon .....  or ever . 

Ken junior follows you in the news . He was impressed by the way you didn't apologise to the victims of Mr Gvir's abuse , lied about abuse not being government policy , and simply reprimanded Mr Gvir for a foolish PR blunder . 

In your address to the world press you used the expression   " Provocative Flotilla of Hamas supporters "  ,  a clever device  that avoids the need to make an apology .    Very like an abusive husband who says to his back-eyed wife  " You shouldn't provoke me like that , you crazy fool .  Now look what you made me do . " 

Anyway , keep up the good work . Israel's  reputation depends on you . 

Your comrade , Ken . 

PS. Ken junior laughed when he reminded me that Mr Gvir called the last Gaza Aid Flotilla  " The Selfie Flotilla "  It's ironic that Mr Gvir now makes his own "selfies " . Mind you , the Flotilla "selfies " do manage to garner international support , unlike those of Mr Gvir .  I guess it's because he is not very photogenic ...... but please don't mention that to him  . He seems like somebody whose pride is fragile .  

 

 

Reference :- The Israeli Ambassador to Australia was interviewed by Sarah Ferguson on the ABC .

 Reference :-  Does the IDF ever mistreat prisoners ? No,we are told . 

 Sarah asked the Ambassador whether the Israeli government will investigate reports of prisoner abuse by the IDF . The good Ambassador explained that reports of abuse are the malicious fabrications of antisemites .  Ms Ferguson tried pressing the good Ambassador to confirm that there will be investigations to prove to the world that such slanderous reports are untrue .   The good Ambassador made no such confirmation . 

Clearly there is no need to investigate something when you already know the outcome .  

Not necessarily the evidence . 

Just the outcome .  

Anyhow , in other news , the river out here at Kooralya  has flooded . Quite a big flood for this time of year .   The water has reached the town park playground .  All the way from 

the river to the seesaw 

 the slippery slide is still functioning , but it ends in a quagmire .  

The kids need to be careful .

Your comrade , 

Ken .  

 

 

 

 

Reference:- The Sky Reply Team is back after a few legal difficulties .

Reference:-  The Sky Reply Team acknowledges that "freedom of speech " in Australia was not a right , but a temporary privilege that has been withdrawn . 

The lads here in our editorial room ( the built in verandah beside the old water tank ) have turned over a new leaf , and henceforth will be careful to avoid offending those in power . To introduce our new style , one that respectfully supports the status quo , Ken junior has written a nice letter to the leader of the Federal Opposition congratulating him on his recent Budget Reply speech . 

 Dear Mr Angus Taylor , Sir , 

                                                That was a great speech you gave yesterday . I have printed a copy , and stapled it into my tome titled " The World's Most Famous Speeches ". At first I was going to put it in the index under the  "A" s , ( for Angus ) but that would have put you right beside a certain " Adolf " chap ....not a good look .  Instead you are indexed by last name , which puts you beside " Trotsky " . Personally I have never heard of this Trotsky fellow , but old Graham down at the local Workers Cooperative  reckons he was a good speaker , so rest assured you are in good company . 

Anyway , I did like the way you have " developed " the policy of your competition and taken a stand against unwanted foreigners from warlike regimes  .   Dad reckons that it sounds like you want to start an " ICE " department , like his highness , Mr Trump , in the USA .  But , what with all the killing and beating and wrongful detention and all , I reckon that you should avoid starting a similarly named department here in the Antipodes . 

What we need is a more measured , humane and legal way to expel those who refuse to embrace our unique version of neoliberal capitalism .  I reckon you should consider starting a department called " FROST "     ( Find and Remove Offensive Seditious Transients ) .     This has the advantage of looking like a fresh idea that is all your own , while the definition of " Offensive Seditious Transients " is suitably vague and allows you to expel whoever you like .  Socialists , for example . 

Good luck with it all .  If you decide to run with my suggested moniker , whilst I do not own the copyright, thanking me by way of a few quid mailed in a brown envelope would be greatly appreciated.  You can claim it as a charitable donation on your tax return , and if you keep the sum under 4 figures it won't effect my disability pension . 

I prefer to deal with cash where possible  ( you can't trust the banks ), and I am sure you will have a few brown envelopes lying about somewhere subsequent to previous transactions . 

Also , I suspect my emails are being monitored , so be careful what you say in your reply . 

Your comrade , 

Ken  junior. 

 

Reference:- Israeli Prime Minister , Isaac Herzog has completed his visit to Australia .

 Reference :-   Did Mr Herzog achieve what he hoped to achieve during his visit to Australia ?

Dear Mr Herzog , 

                              In your closing remarks , at the end of a busy schedule  , you mentioned that you hoped to have created closer ties between Australia and Israel .  I must say that you have succeeded . Scenes from the streets of our capital cities are so similar to the scenes we see on the streets of Tel Aviv that at times we could barely recognise our own country.   What with all the protests and police violence and hospitalisations and arrests you must have felt very much at home.   And as you leave it seems that in your wake new laws criminalising  freedom of expression are sprouting like mushrooms in a compost heap .  

You must be very pleased .  Here in Queensland , Ken junior attended a pro-Palestine rally . He tells me it was completely peaceful , which obviously explains why it didn't feature in the news media . It certainly was a disappointing failure .  He also tells me that most of the folk he met there were Jewish , including three mature aged Jewish women carrying a banner that read " Jews for Palestine "  .   I guess they were three of those " self -hating " Jews we read about in " The Times of Israel " . 

Our state government has just passed legislation  making it a criminal offense to chant " From the river to the sea "  .  I reckon they should have also banned chanting "  Jews for Palestine " .  Here at the Sky Reply we have noted the explanation that " from the river to the sea " is actually newspeak for " destroy Israel" , and we can see how that makes complete sense .  By extrapolation it is apparent that " Jews for Palestine " is actually newspeak for " Jews who want to destroy Israel  " , and must also be condemned . 

That had us all thinking about the true meaning of other subversive slogans .  Ken junior came up with a  list of other undeniable , but mostly harmless , examples of newspeak that  illustrate the logic behind the framing of the new laws .  It is such a long list that it is not practical to reproduce it here .  But here is my favourite. 

                        SLOGAN                                        ACTUAL MEANING 

       "  SAVE THE KOALA "                              " CARROTS CAN TALK " 

You can see how the same logic applies . 

Thank you for your visit and all the goodwill you have spread . 

Your comrade , Ken .  

 

                             

 

 

                               

                          

Reference:- President of Israel , Mr Isaac Herzog , is expected to vist Australia in the coming days.

Reference:-  Nationwide protests are planned , opposing Mr Herzog's visit to Australia . 

Dear  Isaac , 

                      I hope you don't mind being addressed by your first name .  As an old man , it feels natural , and friendlier , to address a younger man this way .  Only a few days remain before your planned visit to the Antipodes , so let me get straight to the point of this letter . 

Many folk  ... and let's not mince words ..... are disgusted to hear of your visit . As an Aussie citizen who has keenly observed our culture since before you were born ,  I feel well able to read the mood of the man or woman in the street .  For millions of folk , your visit will be extremely unwelcome .  There will be protests across the nation , costly for our police who have better things to do , and our politicians will be preoccupied balancing popular outrage against their re-election prospects .  ( They also have better things to do . ) 

The great unwashed are easily manipulated , and the leftist media has successfully convinced many folk that Israel is committing a genocide in Gaza , and that you personally are involved . This may be unfair , but you must admit that images in the media do look a tad genocidey . When you claim that nobody in Gaza is innocent and write messages on bombs that will be dropped on children ,  propagandized minds might rush to the conclusion that you are a war criminal .  Accusations of genocide might be ridiculous and unfair , but should not be ignored. 

As you well know , the Australian Government  has introduced , following  advice from the Israeli lobby , broad new hate speech laws which are retrospective in scope .  These new hate speech laws have the potential to backfire .  Obviously it was only antisemitic hate speech that the laws were intended to criminalize , but they were ineptly rushed through , which means all hate speech is now illegal .  Sadly , you could find yourself within their purview . Thousands have called for your arrest when you arrive in Australia .  

You seem like a reasonable young chap to me . As far as I am concerned folk should be able to write whatever they like , even if they write it on bombs . Personally , although I avoid generalisations which condemn entire populations , I support  the principal of freedom of speech . In my opinion , one should not fall foul of the law for saying what one believes . If you believe all Palestinians should bear the blame for the actions of a few , surely you should have the right to express this belief .  

Unfortunately , however , you may run afoul of Australia's new retrospective hate speech laws .  

Isaac , I think you should consider cancelling your visit . That will keep thousands of protestors off our streets and let us get on with the business of running our country .   Why not offer free trips to Israel for those who were traumatised by the horrific Bondi terrorist attack ?   Politicians from around the world regularly travel to Israel at your expense via your  " junket " program,  designed  to showcase the wonderful democracy of Israel which boasts the most moral army in the world .  A few shekels more to help the families of the Bondi victims would not be missed . 

Anyway , if you do come to Australia and wish to avoid the limelight , you are most welcome to stay here in Kooralya . We can provide accommodation gratis , although with the water restrictions we cannot offer the free laundry service that Mr Netanyahu demands on his state visits , so bring plenty of fresh clobber since it is hot here at this time of the year .  Ken junior says he can whip up some Kosher victuals for you out of our vege patch . He reckons that as a dedicated adherent of Judaism you would be unwilling to eat our local beef . 

Hope this has been helpful .

Your comrade , Ken . 

PS.     Ken junior says it might be unwise to invite the families of the Bondi victims to Israel .   He reckons some of them might not support Israel , and refuse the invitation , which would look bad .    Do you think there could have been many of those non - Zionist ( I think you call them self-hating ) Jews at Bondi who feel that they were placed in harm's way by Israel's actions in Gaza and the West Bank ?

 It might not be worth the risk . 

 

 

 

 

 

Reference:- It has been a challenging couple of weeks for The Sky Reply .

 Reference : -   The new hate speech laws temporarily silenced the Sky Reply Team . 

It behoves one to stay abreast of changes in the law. One hardly relishes the thought of being imprisoned due to an oversight .  The recently introduced hate speech laws required 500 pages to be read with due diligence , following which we felt it advisable to seek the advice of a suitably qualified attorney .  Suitably qualified attorneys expect to be well remunerated , which did slice a sizeable chunk out of our monthly budget . This meant waiting for my pension cheque to arrive so we could buy a fresh ribbon for the trusty Remington .   Anyone can see that the new laws are a hasty response to the appalling antisemitic terror attack at Bondi ,  and it is with antisemitism in mind that we should view them . 

We expected that Ms Michelle Rowland , in the role of Attorney General that she has assumed since her unfortunate ....ahem .... travel expenses misunderstanding...would unambiguously explain the new laws .  Sadly we were disappointed . ABC interviewer , young David Speers , made a great effort to coax an explanation from Michelle , but without success . 

Before dipping into our life savings , we also watched Senator David Shoebridge  explain why , after reading the 500 pages , he refused to vote for the new laws.  David clearly explained why the laws are  unclear , and difficult to explain .  Subsequently we have seen a chap thrown in jail for writing something on the interweb said to violate these new laws.   It is fair to say that we are a tad twitchy here at the Sky Reply . 

As senior editor , I would like to explain from the outset that we do not hate either Michelle Rowland or the ABC  , nor David Speers or David Shoebridge .  Here at The Sky Reply we hate nobody , and only risk tactfully admonishing those whom the government has granted tacit permission for us to criticise.   That , after all , defines freedom of speech .   

The new hate laws are very general and vague at best ,  so as a service to our millions of faithful readers ,  we have listed a few specific examples that demonstrate how the laws appear to apply . 

                STATEMENT                                        HOW IT MIGHT BE DEEMED UNDER HATE LAWS

 Ayatolla Ali Khamenei is evil .                                                                Free speech 

 Benjamin Netanyahu evil.                                                                        Hate speech . 

Palestinians are raised to be terrorists.                                                      Free speech  

Israeli children are taught to support genocide .                                       Hate speech . 

Jews who oppose Zionism are self -hating .                                             Free speech

Millions of Jews oppose the State of Israel .                                            Hate speech . 

The slaughter in Iran is being exaggerated by the media  .                      Hate speech

The slaughter in Gaza is being exaggerated by the media.                      Free speech . 

The Palestinians have brought destruction upon themselves .                 Free speech . 

Israel has brought destruction upon itself .                                              Hate speech . 

Putin is a war criminal .                                                                           Free speech 

Netanyahu is a war criminal                                                                    Hate speech  

Radical Islam is a major problem for the world                                     Free speech 

Zionism is a major problem for the world .                                            Hate speech . 

Wearing Burkas shows a reluctance to integrate .                                   Free speech

Wearing  Kippahs shows a reluctance to integrate .                               Hate speech . 

Greater Israel is a promise from God.                                                    Free speech . 

From the river to the sea Palestine will be free .                                    Hate speech . 

" Give them (Palestinians ) hell !  " .  Jordan Peterson .                        Free speech . 

"Palestinians have the right to resist . " . Christopher Hitchens            Hate speech . 

All the Palestinians must leave their homes or die .                              Free speech . 

The Israelis should end their illegal occupation  .                                 Hate speech .

Hamas is a terrorist organisation that bombs innocent civilians .         Free speech .

Mossad is a terrorist organisation that bombs innocent civilians .        Hate speech. 

The Palestinian Authority  manipulates  the United Nations .               Free speech   

The Likud Party of Israel  manipulates  the United Nations.                 Hate speech . 

The Koran threatens violence to non -believers .                                   Free speech . 

The Torah threatens violence to non-believers .                                    Hate speech  

 

This list is far from compendious , but usefully illustrative . 

We welcome any amendments by readers whose opinions differ , as long as the do not in any way denigrate persons living or dead ... or legally qualified. 

Yours in freedom of speech , 

Ken 

PS.   Ken junior has asked me to confirm that it is Ken Senior who wrote this , and that he had nothing to do with it .  When asked what he thought of the new hate speech laws he replied ...

" Never heard of them " .