Reference :- The historic rose garden at The White House has been bulldozed and revamped .

Reference :-  Donald and Melania Trump have done some gardening . It is a good story for Rowan Dean . 

This is a great opportunity for you Rowan .   Exploiting the songs of deceased performers is all the rage these days , and country singer Lynn Anderson's song   " Rose Garden " is ripe for the plucking .   How does it start again ?     " I beg your pardon , I never promised you a rose garden  "    and then straight after 

" along with the sunshine , there's gotta be a little rain some time "    .  Its pure gold  Rowan , with all those lyrics about broken promises and so on .   

  I see that although Republicans get tetchy if somebody pulls down an historic statue of a murderer , they are untroubled if its just an historic tree planted in a rose garden by a former president's wife .     Ken junior thought that the Civil Rights Act was signed and celebrated beneath those trees , but honestly , do we really need to preserve a tree just because a symbolic , but essentially worthless , piece of legislation was signed nearby ?  

 Since we thought of it first , could you mention The Sky Reply in your credits ?   I know Sky News abhors plagiarism , and no payment for copyright is expected . 

   Your comrade , Ken .

                                   

                                    

                               

Reference :- Self-effacing Sky News anchor and weather boy Rowan Dean took the credit for the cancelling of China's Belt and Road Initiative plans in Australia .

Reference :-  Young Rowan is not one to blow his own tuba , but on this occasion he felt compelled to point out that he has foiled China's plans to dominate Australia .

That was a great result Rowan .  I guess the advantage you have is that all the world leaders no doubt watch your news segment looking for advice on how to run the world .   False modesty is unbecoming , so of course you should accept the credit you deserve . 

 Ken junior says that hardly anybody watches your show , so how could you be so influential ?   But it's not how many people watch your show , it's who they are that matters .   I have heard a rumor that the other night our Prime Minister's tele fritzed out , and rather than miss your broadcast he drove around to a mate's place in his pajamas post -haste , to tune in . '

 Anyway Rowan , you seem to have stopped including your compelling musical interludes of late . I hope it's not because somebody sued you for using their creative genius to promote  a neoliberal creed that they despise .  

 Currently there is a bit of a fracas brewing over President Trump's use of Leonard Cohen's song "  Hallelujah" for marketing purposes .     Although Mr Cohen is deceased , I reckon he would not approve .  

Mind you , Mr Cohen did write a song that he possibly would be happy for Mr Trump to exploit . 

Remember this one Rowan ? It starts like this . 

                                          Everybody Knows     ( by Leonard Cohen ) 

                           Everybody knows that the dice are loaded 

                           Everybody Rolls with their fingers crossed 

                           Everybody knows the war is over 

                           Everybody knows the good guys lost 

                          Everybody knows the fight was fixed 

                          The poor stay poor the rich get rich 

                          That's how it goes 

                           Everybody knows  

 You should mention it in your next appearance , and  Mr Trump will no doubt appreciate the tip when he  tunes in for his daily advice .     

                      Your comrade , Ken .

                        

                                                                                          

                           

Reference :- The Sky Reply has returned , with even greater haste than the recent return of Frankenjonesie .

Reference : -  Upon their return to the cutting edge of Australian journalism  ,  The Sky Reply team was shocked to see how far Sky News had sunk beneath towering waves of journalistic mediocrity . 

 Holy cow !    What has happened at Sky News ?   Not one of the anchors at Sky News has made an interesting , insightful or relevant comment in days .  One could say the same of the Prime Minister (currently incognito)  Mr Scott Morrison . But it isn't entirely Mr Morrison's  responsibility to anger the great unwashed,  and distract them while the elite rob them blind and stuff the planet . That is also what Sky News is supposed to be doing ....and ladies and gentleman of Sky News , you are failing in your duty. . 

Lest The Sky Reply team find themselves with nothing worthy of a reply , we offer herewith a suggestion for an editorial which might bear fruit .   

You may have noticed that another black man has been shot by one of those "protect and serve " police officers in Kenosha , Wisconsin . This has , yet again , incited unreasonable protests .   The video footage  looks bad , but for heavens sake don't just ignore the whole incident and say nothing .  Fox presenter , young Tucker Carlson , has stepped up to the plate and exposed the shocking bias in the reporting by leftist media outlets .  Lamentably Sky News is  behaving as though nobody would  touch this story with a ten foot barge pole , so allow us to offer you an eleven foot one . 

  Straight away you need to front foot it , and point out that even a highly trained professional copper sometimes needs to fire a warning shot to avert a possible tragedy  . In this instance seven warning shots to the spine at point blank range probably prevented the serious escalation of a dangerous situation .   This measured response meant that  nobody was actually killed . Admittedly the victim ,  Mr Blake , is now a paraplegic , but did he become a paraplegic " because " he had 7 bullets in his back , or did he become a paraplegic "with " seven bullets in his back ?    I guess we will never know , after all , in the USA there are over 5 million people with spinal paralysis and the overwhelming majority have never been shot by the cops . 

This could be a good story for Andy Bolt to run with , as he tirelessly wages war against the left .... I mean racism .  

Stay calm  , more help will follow .         Your comrade , Ken 

 

 

Reference :- The last Sky Reply

  Reference : - Due to circumstances beyond our control , The Sky Reply will take a sabbatical .

Dear Reader ,  

                        We regret to advise that this is the last Sky Reply , for now .    Recently a bushfire ravaged the outskirts of the Kooralya township .   Unfortunately Ken junior had sold our firefighting equipment to pay his Robodebt , and we could only look on helplessly as our premises burned to the ground . 

We have been told that a lightning strike started the conflagration , but in our opinion there are suspicious circumstances .    

 Arsonists start fires in Australia ,  not lightning ,  like other countries . 

 The Sky Reply team was eating another batch of Ken junior's herb cookies , when Dog chased  a  suspicious vehicle from the scene .   It looked like a hot Torana  driven by a witch with a parrot beside her .   From the back seat some drunk chap and a blonde golliwog shrieked with vile laughter while a   bearded fat ghoul shouted  " Long live V8s ! " 

It's not much to go on , sadly .   We hope to return in the very near future , after we set up a new tax deductible studio in our mate Trevor's rumpus room .  

 Your comrades ,           Ken senior ,  Ken junior , Gabbo , Monte  and Dog .

Reference :- We are waiting for the meteorologist at Sky News , Rowan Dean , to laugh at the fires in California .

 Reference :-    California is ablaze  , but where is the detailed assessment by Rowan Dean ? 

Oh dear Rowan , don't tell me you are letting fellow journalist Chris Kenny cover the California fires for you .   He did a fair job of explaining that it was just a normal fire season , but he does lack your flair . 

It seems that 200,000 folk near San Francisco have been advised to evacuate lest they face incineration . 

But Rowan , San Francisco suffered a catastrophic conflagration in 1851  , so their experience with uncontrollable infernos  goes back at least as far as The Great Fire , as it is called.   Although  The Great Fire is thought to be the result of arson , not lightning strikes like the current California fires . I reckon the arsonists must have immigrated to Australia when the gold rush fever headed our way .  That would explain why our fires are now the result of arson and not lightning like the old days . 

There is a lot of material for you there Rowan .

For now , I  guess you might be waiting for climate change alarmists to declare the current fires " unprecedented " before running a segment .  And I guess the fires will be blazing for weeks yet , so you have plenty of time to prepare a suitably hilarious appraisal of events that you can giggle your way through .  Andy Bolt should join you , after a whisky or two naturally . 

Your comrade , Ken 

 

 

Reference :- Andy Bolt's fight to save the country from fake aborigines has not ended .

Reference :-    Author Bruce Pascoe has been pilloried again by Andy Bolt .  Why ? 

Ok Andy .  Sky Reply contributor , Monte  ( the motorcyclist )  reckons he has figured out why you are so annoyed with Mr Pascoe .   He has looked at the sales figures for Mr Pascoe's book,  " Dark Emu " and says that over multiple editions it has outsold your own recent tome " Worth Fighting For " by about five to one .  Monte thinks you might be jealous . 

We were in the big smoke the other day ,  running the gauntlet of the fake pandemic , and Monte decided we should check out a major bookstore or two.  It saddens me to say that we couldn't find your book anywhere , and some of the clerks laughed at us when we said we were hoping to buy a copy .  Meanwhile  Mr Pascoe's book was prominently displayed at the front counters .  Though we were lucky to secure  a copy, since they were almost sold out. 

 There is a lesson here Andy .    Gabbo ( the Aborigine ) reckons folk who frequent bookstores are not generally interested in poisonous neoliberal claptrap .  Personally I think that is a bit harsh of him , especially since we have been unable to buy a copy with which to determine it's contents . A while back , Charlie , the Kooralya newsagent , did have a few copies of your book on display next to The Courier Mail , but they didn't sell , and he said they had just turned up without him ordering them anyway , so he sent them back .  

Anyway  Andy , might I be see so bold as to request a complimentary copy of your omnibus ?   The Sky Reply has been a loyal fan through good and bad , and we would appreciate a copy for our extensive library .  The lads have been discussing where to put it .   If we file it alphabetically by author , that would put it beside  Bin Laden's book " Messages to the World "  .  But Gabbo reckons that would look a bit weird , since Osama's book was a best seller . 

Monte thinks we could file it by title  , which puts it beside  " The Witches " by Roald Dahl .   I said  " But the plot is just a dark and evil fantasy for children , and  Monte replied  " so is " The Witches "  .  Well, I guess that is where it will go .  

You might be pleased to hear that we won't be filing " Dark Emu "  in our library at all .  We are donating it to the school library , since they are using it as inspiration for a school project . 

Also Andy , could you sign your book before you post it ?   It makes things seem more personal , and maybe one day a signed copy will be worth a few quid as a novelty  .   If you could write ,

" To the team at The Sky Reply , especially Gabbo , with thanks for your support as I battled the bottle . " ,

it would be greatly appreciated . 

Your comrade , Ken 

 

 

Reference :- Andy Bolt ran a story in which he accused the mass media of being tacky .

Reference :-   Andy Bolt thought that the mass media were cruel to President Trump in the days after his brother died . 

 What can you say Andy ?  It was awful.   The folk at Sky News would never stoop so low .   Although Ken junior did think that it was a tad insensitive of Alan Jones to suggest that the father of Prime Minister Julia Gillard had died of shame while her family was still mourning their loss . 

Ken junior was very young then , and I explained that Jonesie was just joking , since he then went on to say that he wanted to put Julia into a chaff bag and throw her into the sea , which was clearly a joke meant to buoy her spirits .    You have to laugh , don't you Andy ?   I sure miss the days of respectful professionalism in the media ,  but it's all about the filthy lucre  now .    Jonesie was never worried about the money .  He fearlessly lost millions of quid  in advertising for his employers , but always spoke his mind . 

I  feel sorry for him when I think of the fallout he suffered just because he said somebody should stuff a sock down the throat of New Zealand Prime Minister, Jacinda Ardern .   That's the trouble with the latte sipping left , they take offense so readily that a harmless little joke can ruin a career . 

Your comrade , Ken 

 

 

Reference :- According to Alan Jones , we don't need now , and never needed, a lockdown to contain the pandemic .

 Reference :-  The logic of Alan Jones has once again left us gasping in amazement . 

 

Thanks Alan .  You have reasserted that we shouldn't surrender our freedom to power hungry governments and bureaucrats . Of course , as you say , we should be allowed to travel about freely , it is a basic human right . 

Although you do say that the same bureaucrats who stole our freedom also failed the community by not locking enough people in hotels , especially folk recently returned from sea voyages , or folk returning to the lucky country in crowded aircraft .   The  bone ignorant ( your witty phrase ) bureaucrats just let them wander about freely and spread contagion .

But then again , Alan , you say there is no pandemic anyway , so why should we care ?   That's what I like about your lines of reasoning , they are so logical. 

You quoted Professor John Ioannidis, from California , who reckons we don't  really have a pandemic .   The good professor has had much to say about the prevalence of the virus , although on May 11th  he did admit to a 300% error in the statistics from the study he released on April 17th .    A small error of no significance probably .  Angus Taylor would call that a rounding error .

Furthermore , critics have pointed to the fact that the founder of the airline JetBlue had supported the study handsomely via a tax deductible donation .   But how would a budget airline  benefit from a study that concluded we can all sit close to each other without fear of contagion ?  It's simply ridiculous .

 Your comrade , Ken

 

 

 

Reference :- The brains of Sky News , Alan Jones , explained why we have had dreadful bushfires .

Reference :-   Alan Jones blamed the Greens for the terrible bushfires .

 Thanks Jonesie , it's all clear to us now .  The worst bushfires we have ever experienced were caused by the policies of Green politicians  who have insidiously infiltrated all levels of government .  They should be paraded through the streets and publicly shamed . And that wouldn't be hard , since you could fit the lot of them in the back of my Kingswood ute . 

As you point out , it's at the local level that they do the most damage .  You are a fan of statistics , and always explain the numbers to us .  So could you tell Ken junior why NSW had such terrible fires when less than 4% of local councils have a Green Mayor ?   You will know.

 Your reports are always gold to us Jonesie , compared with those of young  Andy Bolt which are more of a "Black and Gold"  standard , if you get my drift .   Andy always bleats on about bushfires being the same as they ever were , as does Rowan Dean .  ( Running with the previous analogy ,  Rowan  is more of a  " marked down for quick sale " journalist  according to Ken junior ) 

 But we are with you on this one Jonesie , being in the bush ourselves we have seen the fires first hand, and they were terrible .

Anyway , as we approach our own fire season with trepidation , have you seen the fires currently raging upstairs in the more Northern of our Hemispheres ?   They are certainly impressive,  at least in the sense of vast and uncontrollable devastation .

Ken junior reckons that Russia must have a very influential Greens party to cause such conflagrations .  Much of the Arctic is burning thanks to the policies of Russian Greens .  But also ,  of course , disenchanted communist arsonists ,  like ours , who drive hundreds of miles into the Tundra with a box of matches to make mischief .

You would think that Mr Putin would do something to prevent Socialists from ruining  his country , but perhaps he can't provide the kind of strong leadership that we enjoy here with Mr Morrison . 

 Your comrade , Ken  

Reference :- Sky anchor Andy Bolt seemed rather " tired and emotional " last night .

Reference :-   Perhaps young Andy is feeling a tad remorseful for calling out Prime Minister Morrison the other day . 

Andy , whatever you do , don't hit the bottle .   The lads at The Sky Reply reckon you were totally wasted during last night's show .  I set them straight and explained that you were probably just tired and emotional after confronting the Prime Minister .  But they kept laughing at you through your evening telecast , and rolled about cracking jokes about being slaughtered , tanked , wasted and hammered .  They can be pretty childish at times , and I had to tell them to settle down because it was hard to understand what you were saying . And for some reason our tele suffered from bad reception and you sounded slurred and hesitant .   

Anyway Andy , I am sure you hadn't imbibed too much whisky prior to your nightly performance , but it might be wise to monitor your consumption .   My mate Trevor always draws a line on the decanter of his rum still , so he knows where he started before he goes on a two week bender .  So there's a good tip for something you could do  .  (  I mean the line , not the two week bender . )

You seem like a chap with a healthy sense of humour , so I know you will find this funny .  Gabbo ( the aborigine ) jumped up last night and swooped about the room with arms outstretched shaking his head and repeatedly asking "  Who am I ? Who am I ?  "    When we said we couldn't guess , he blurted ,

"  Andy Bolt under full sail  !  "   and fell to the floor clutching his belly with laughter . 

That set us all off , but there was no offense meant  , Andy . 

 You and Gabbo  may occupy opposite ends of the colour spectrum , and every other spectrum I can think of ,  but as you so often remind us , that doesn't mean there isn't a strong mutual respect . 

Your comrade , Ken

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                            

Reference :- Some thoughts on epistemology , virology and the ideology of immunology .

 Reference :-   Russian scientists may have developed a vaccine for  COVID 19 .  But Sky News expressed grave doubts . 

Dear purveyors of ignored news and opinionated matters ,   

According to Ken junior , stating that Sky News allows ideology to contaminate the epistemology of immunology is an obvious tautology .  When the president of the USA , Mr Trump , announced in layman's terminology that hydroxychloroquine  cured viruses of Chinese etiology , despite concerns about it's toxicology , Sky News didn't question his methodology  .  Likewise nobody at Sky News questioned the president of Brazil , Mr Bolsonaro , when (to make an analogy )he claimed exclusive philology in the realm of epidemiology , as he does with climatology .

Yet when Russian president , Mr Putin , announced that Russian researchers in biotechnology and immunology had developed a vaccine for the dread pathology , Sky News accused him of playing  games with psychology to promote the mythology of Russia's superior technology  and the impressive chronology of its developing pharmacology .

 Don't ask me what Ken junior means  by all that .  He said the morphology of his detailed ontology eludes me with it's lexicology , and made an apology .  

 Like Sky News , the editor of The Sky Reply always strives to assert his intellectual superiority .  

So I told Ken junior  , " That sounds dodgy ".

Your confused comrade , Ken  

 

 

                                               

 

Reference :- Master of the condescending laugh , Andy Bolt , reprimanded the Prime Minister on Sky News .

Reference :-     Andy Bolt spluttered with anger because our esteemed Prime Minister suggested that Andy was willing to let a few older folk die, if necessary , to save the economy .  

Don't feel bad for dusting Mr Morrison , Andy .  Sure , you have strongly supported him and his neoliberal cronies in the past , through floods and fires and droughts and climate change and all manner of accounting errors and stuff ups . 

But look where it has got you .  Don't think for a minute that Mr Morrison was only making a mistake when he accused you of suggesting we offer up our elderly as a sacrifice to save the economy .  He is no fool, and without wishing to stoke your paranoia , I reckon he is trying  to totally destroy your career out of sheer jealousy .

Think about it Andy .  You get on the tele far more than him .  By your own admission you are the most popular conservative journalist in the country . ( I daresay you will be awarded a Nobel Prize for Conservativeness before very long ) .   You have all the answers to our problems , and he has none .  He hasn't even noticed that we are being overrun by fake aborigines , something you have warned us of persistently . 

So Andy , take my advice , and destroy him before he destroys you .   You know how these things go. Your ratings will fall, and then Sky will accuse you of some sexual misdemeanor from years ago so they can void your contract and keep your accrued holiday pay .     There is no shortage of shabby sheilas who would willingly point their finger at yours and say it had caused mischief .    Especially in exchange for a tax free stipend or an off balance sheet cash transaction .   Are you with me , Andy ?

You must stick the knife in Andy , and though I know you are not the spiteful type , you must do it now without hesitation . 

There is plenty of material you can use , and deposing a Prime Minister will be another feather in your cap when invitations to the next Nobel Prizes are being dished out . 

If you need some dirt in a hurry , the barmaid at the Kooralya pub says that if you slip her a few quid she will tell you all about the time  Mr Morrison touched her inappropriately when she was serving beer at a footy tournament or something .   For a few quid more she might even be able to remember where it was he touched her .... I think it was in Sydney . 

Let me know if we can help.   Your comrade , Ken

Reference :- Witty weatherman Rowan Dean has overlooked a few fires in the northern hemisphere .

Reference :-   It seems that even France is experiencing severe wildfires at present .

Rowan , you seem to have overlooked  the wildfires currently raging in the northern hemisphere. 

Thousands of folk have had to evacuate assorted regions due to uncontrollable infernos .   I figure you may be reluctant to highlight these fires in your state of the art weather reports , fearing  that woke latte sipping virtue signalling leftists ( the worst kind of leftist )  might call them "unprecedented ".

Well Rowan , the Sky Reply is here to help you with that dilemma .   My sadly missed late uncle Bartholomew ( we liked to call him "Biggles " )   used to tell us stories about the terrible fires that  swept Europe decades ago .  So you could hardly call the current  conflagrations  unprecedented . 

Uncle Biggles used to fly an aircraft called a Lockheed P-38 Lightning all over Europe in his youth , so he could snap  photos of the countryside . Mostly roads , railway lines and bridges apparently .   He used to tell us that half of Europe looked to be on fire back in 1944.   Especially the cities .    

So Rowan , I reckon you should just come clean and report the current fires so you don't look shifty .  We can post you copies of a few photos that uncle Biggles took back in 1944 if you like . They will certainly prove that fires have always been a normal thing in Europe .  You should see the ones of Dresden , talk about a fireman's nightmare .   I guess that's what happens if you let the greenies stop load reduction burns , you can lose an entire bloody city .

Let us know if you do need copies of a few of uncle Biggles'  old photos to make your case , and we can forward a selection of his best .  

You can have them gratis , although it would be nice if you could give due credit to uncle Biggles in some way .  And a donation to the Kooralya RSL club would be well received . Ken junior hangs wooden plaques on the walls of the bar , thanking the more generous donors , and we could put yours right beside the one we put up years ago thanking Gough Whitlam . 

 Gough was especially generous with his donation , since I hear he was pretty cashed up at the time .

Your comrade , Ken

Reference:- The weather expert at Sky News , Rowan Dean , thinks Covid19 is the new climate change .

Reference :-   Rowan Dean informed us that Covid 19 is the latest fraud propagated by  " the Left " .  

Rowan , I reckon when you have the time you should flick us a quick definition of who "the left " actually are  .  Out here at Kooralya we believe we are mercifully free from  the insidious influence of what you call  "leftists intent on destroying society"  .  

 Ken junior  , who gets about more than me , reckons nobody in Kooralya wants anything other than the very best for society .   He raised the subject at the local meeting of the  Kooralya  chapter of the Fabian Society and  he said everybody there was all in favour of a happy , fair and prosperous society , free from the shackles of capitalist oppression .  So it looks like we have no leftists here Rowan ,  although the Mayor , who closed the train station to make his trucking business thrive sure did the community no favours , so perhaps he is one of these leftists you rant about . 

 My son , Ken junior , is at an awkward age , and asks lots of tricky questions about political ideology .  The other day he asked me what it means to be a " conservative " .    I wonder if you can help me with that one Rowan ?     Ken junior was in a funny  state of mind after attending a meeting of the Fabians , and was quite annoyed when I had difficulty answering his question .     He suddenly blurted out  " Well these conservatives don't conserve the air , the water , the land , the wildlife , civil rights or the dignity and prosperity of the common man .....so what the hell do they conserve!!?? " 

If you  have offspring yourself Rowan , you will know how hard it can be at times . 

 I look forward with anticipation to your sapient reply .   

Your comrade , Ken

Reference :- Polite Presenter ,Peta Credlin , seems unhappy with Victoria's response to the current pandemic .

 Reference  :  Sky Anchor Peta Credlin asked Victorian premier , Daniel Andrews , a serious question  when she respectfully inquired " What's the plan Dan ? " 

Indeed Peta , questions need to be asked . Especially in Australia's  communist state .  Sky News has been quick to point out that Victorian's despise their premiere , though the polls show most people think he is doing a good job .   You can't trust polls though , can you ?  Sky Anchor  Paul Murray says  the Victorians are suffering from  that " Stockholm's Syndrome "  , in which captors fall in love with the person who holds them captive .    Of course he means "  Stockholm Syndrome " sans the possessive , but Paul is not the sort of chap who wastes his time with verisimilitude . 

Polls are at best a flawed tool with which to gauge  public opinion . Unless of course they support your own position , in which case they become  " the facts "  ,  so often quoted on Sky News . 

 Your partner in crime , Alan Jones , reckons there is no pandemic , but still excoriates Mr Andrews for not dealing with it adequately  .  Jonesie has always expressed unique views , so it comes as no surprise that he is angry with somebody for not crushing a pandemic that he says does not exist .  But Peta , I would not say too much about that in his company , or he may stop recommending you for the job of Prime Minister, as he does every ten minutes or so . 

Up here in the deep north ( Queensland  )  we are going pretty well as far as the numbers of clapped up folk are concerned .   Of course Sky News constantly reminds us that our premier is actually doing a terrible job .   I guess that's the trouble with this virus thing . If you don't contain it Sky News calls you a terrible leader , and if you do contain it you are also called a terrible leader .  Obviously Sky News  promotes no particular ideology , but is it a Buddhist thing Peta ?    You know , that stuff about " the middle path  ".    Maybe Sky News could let our leaders know how many cases of the disease represent " the middle path " and  Queensland  can aim for that ? 

Ken junior has come up with a title for your presentation , which you can use gratis . 

"  What do you say , Palaszcuk ? "       

  Pretty catchy , but suitably respectful , don't you think ? 

Your comrade ,  Ken.

 

Reference:- Reborn Sky Anchor , Alan Jones , promoted the Gold Coast .

Reference :-    According to Alan Jones , the Gold Coast is one of Australia's great places . So the lads at the Sky Reply decided to visit for a weekend .

Ken junior , Monte , and Gabbo listened to Jonesie praise the  Gold Coast , so they could hardly wait for the opportunity to spend a weekend there .   The lads have never strayed far from Kooralya , but they are quick to adapt to new circumstances , so I was sure they would be alright by themselves , despite their inexperience .

Of course , they had a wonderful weekend , and  I can see why the Gold Coast ranks so high on
Jonesie's list of must visit destinations .    When the lads returned , we threw a few snags on the barby  , cracked some beers , and  sat on the verandah while they told me of their adventures .
 

Ken junior said that the roads down there are amazing . Huge freeways instead of gravel tracks  . They have these things called tolls , but  Ken junior said they didn't have to worry about them because there is so much grime over the number plates of the Kingswood ute that nobody could trace it anyway .  Monte thought they might be able to crank the old ute along at a fair rate of knots on those smooth roads , but the traffic was so bad they hardly got out of first gear for three hours .  Luckily they had plenty of beer in the esky , so they could sip a couple of roadies and admire the view .  The view consisted mostly of amazing  concrete barricades which succeed in totally obscuring any view of the ocean . Gabbo reckoned the idea must be to ensure that it is a really a great surprise when you finally get to see the briny deep through the locked window of your hotel room .

The hotel was well priced too . It seems that during something called " schoolies week " a student had dived from the roof and missed the swimming pool .    I don't know what happened to him , but the reputation of the hotel was diminished somewhat , and they were running a special offer to fill the rooms .   Ken junior said he was glad they bought their own beer , because a stubby from the bar fridge and a packet of chips cost more than a night out at the Kooralya pub .

The lads aren't really beach types .  There was a shark warning , and the sand was full of strange items , broken glass , and scary smelly things that had floated up from the depths of the ocean . 
The UV rating was off the scale , so they decided to swim in that pool that the student had missed with his unfortunate dive .  But the water was so full of chlorine it made your eyes redder than they get if you eat too many of Ken juniors special herb cookies .

Their big night out was at the Casino  .   There were lots of folk crowding the poker machines , but Monte reckons nobody was a problem gambler , because the toilets were full of notices advising what number to call if you thought you were at risk of becoming a gambling addict .   The lads had no idea how to work a poker machine , but they liked hanging around the" pokies " as they are called , because pretty waitresses gave them lots of free drinks to encourage them to join in the fun .

Ken junior asked one of the waitresses what she did besides serve drinks , and she whispered " Hooker "  in his ear .   Well Ken junior was surprised that a real estate agency would pay somebody so badly that they needed two jobs . He reckons he is sending a letter to L J Hooker  about it .

It must have been the annual policeman's ball or something , because there were a lot of armed police on the streets as they walked back to the hotel , and then  as they turned up a side street a gentleman  with lots of tattoos asked them if they wanted to buy some ice .   Monte said they were going to take ice from the bar fridge to cool the esky on the way home , so no thanks . But it was a nice offer .

On the way home they were pulled over by a policeman , who fined them for having dirty number plates .  That might have soured the whole weekend , but the policeman only fined him 100 quid , and took the money in cash on the spot , which saved the lads from having to post a cheque somewhere .
I guess he was only doing his job . 

The lads had a good time , but they reckon taking the dog for a swim in the creek and a beer at the Kooralya pub suits them better .   Though Ken junior wishes that L J Hooker ran a real estate office here if all their staff are that good looking .     

   Your comrade , Ken

Reference :- Sky Anchor, angry Andy Bolt, redefined the art of cherry picking .

Reference :-   Andy Bolt is angry because american doctor  , Stella Immanuel , has been censored on twitter and facebook .

Indeed Andy , there is no need for such censorship in a free society .  Sadly , back in the old days , we used to censor all kinds of tomes here in Australia .   That leftist filth peddler , D.H. Lawrence , for example . Though he lived in Australia for awhile , his novel " Lady Chatterley's Lover " was banned here I recall.  Of course that only meant we couldn't wait to get a contraband copy to drool over .

So with poor Stella Immanuel being censored , the Sky Reply lost no time in finding out all about her
using the new fangled world wide web  . ( Ken junior is an absolute whizz with all that . It always amazes me what he manages to look up. )

Anyway Andy , your skill in the art of cherry picking is well honed , but perhaps you are taking it a bit too far now .   You say we should listen to young Stella , who tells us we don't need to wear a mask to reduce the risk of viral contagion . Furthermore, she  promotes the use of hydroxyquinone as a cure , which is at best a highly disputed claim , and at worst dangerous quackery .

But then you admit that you find some of the other medical advice she espouses a tad questionable .
You know , the stuff about endometriosis being caused by dreaming about sex with demons , for example .

It seems to us here at the Sky Reply that it weakens your case if you quote somebody as an expert who espouses sound advice , but then discredit the same expert by snickering at their belief that demons cause endometriosis .    Are you with me Andy ?   It makes them ( and you ) look like complete nutjobs .  Cherry picking an expert is one thing , but then cherry picking only specific opinions of that expert is taking things a bit too far .

Please accept this minor criticism in the spirit in which it is intended . We are here to help , not discourage . If you are short of time to cherry pick folk who support your opinions , Ken junior has offered to help .   Such folk are hard to find , which so often means that the Sky News  anchors rather pathetically interview each other .

Ken junior has a tip for you too Andy .  He wonders where all the homeopaths and the herbalists  are hanging out at present ?

They seem to be shirking their role as health care professionals in our time of need .    Our local homeopath , Graham , has vanished to his rainforest retreat . That was straight after Ken junior suggested that he get some coronavirus , dilute it in water lots of times, and then drink it to make himself immune .  Ken junior then produced a vial of spit which he said was from an  infected patient , ripe for the dilution process .  Graham bolted in a flash and hasn't been seen since .

There is a story there I reckon , though it does lack the excitement of sex with demons .   

  Your comrade , Ken .

Reference :- Eloquent Sky anchor Alan Jones has gone a bit quiet on a couple of his favourite topics .

Reference :-    Has Alan Jones found anything of interest to say lately ?   Not that we have heard .


Jonesie old chap , what is the matter ?     You have stopped telling us that the coronavirus pandemic is ....what was it again ?  fake news ? a leftist plot ?  ,  public hysteria  ? or government facism ?    Well anyway , they are all the same I guess .  And what about global warming ?    You have been ignoring that of late too.   Ken junior reckons it's because there have been thousands of new cases of infection  in Victoria since your last rant , and if you prefer to avert your gaze from that mess , at the other side of the globe the bloody arctic is on fire again , pouring more soot into the breeze than has ever been measured before .   I always look to you to set the record straight , because you rely on the facts and eschew  the offensive and belligerent style of delivery that we see far too often on the other channels .

 Anyway , though  we do appreciate your insights into horse racing , the footy and toll roads ,  (and obviously the skilled diplomacy of your warmongering with China ), please remember to keep us armed with the facts regarding the  harmless annual flu season and the coming ice age .  It seems like every time  a few dozen aged care facilities in Victoria get clapped up with lethal contagion , and a few thousand square miles of the arctic are consumed by an uncontrollable conflagration the great unwashed become unduly alarmed .   

It is a hard task you have shouldered Jonesie , but please don't let us down .  The Sky Reply depends on you .            

  Your comrade , Ken .