Reference :- Ken junior explained why he took so long securing our supplies in the big smoke .

Reference :-  Apparently the shelves are becoming bare in the shops everywhere of late . 

Ken junior tells us that he had to spend days in the big smoke shopping for our groceries .  Many of the shops had no stock of certain items  . And those that did often had limits per customer , meaning many visits to many shops . Fortunately he met a nice barmaid called Chantelle at a pub .  Chantelle knew the ropes , and led him around for a few days and steered him to the right places . 

All these shortages are due to those " supply chain difficulties " that we hear about on the tele every night .   But fortunately,  despite food being in short supply , and despite not being able to find any Rapid Antigen Tests  , there was no problem stocking up with all the beer we wanted .  I reckon they ought to consider distributing Rapid Antigen Tests using the same trucks that deliver booze, and sell them at bottle shops . 

Anyway , I asked Ken junior where he had packed the engine gasket kit Monte wanted for his  650 Yamaha .  

" I didn't get one . " , Ken junior said . 

" Why not ? " , I said . 

" Too much trouble , couldn't be bothered . Monte can get stuffed . I decided to spend the money taking Chantelle to the movies . ", Ken junior said . 

Later in the day I was in the kitchen  peeling some spuds for dinner when Monte suddenly arrived . 

" Where's my gasket kit for the Yamaha ? "  , Monte said . 

" Ken junior didn't get one . ",  I said .  

 " What ?  I need it badly . How come he didn't get one ? " ,  Monte said . 

 " Supply chain difficulties . Pass me that potato . ", I said . 

Your comrade , Ken .

Reference:- Ken junior is back from the big smoke.

Reference :-   Ken junior took days to return with our supplies . 

When he arrived back in Kooralya the first thing I wanted to know was why Ken junior  had taken so long to get our supplies .  

" The first thing I want to know is why you took so long to get our supplies . " , I said . 

Dog was jumping all over Ken junior ,  and running around him in tight circles wagging his tail furiously . 

 " It's a long story . Let's unpack first . Hey settle down Dog !  " , Ken junior said 

  Dog did no such thing . 

 Ken junior knelt down , grabbed Dog's collar with one hand and picked up a small stick with the other .  He looked  Dog  in the eyes . Dog tried to lick his face .  Ken junior winced and pulled his head back .

"Dog dog dog dog dog ! " , Ken junior said . 

 Ken junior threw the stick as far down the back yard as he could . Dog paused ,  watched it arc through the air and with ears pricked , noted that it landed beside the chook pen .

 " Go get it boy ! " , Ken junior said . 

Dog's eyes darted  towards the chook pen briefly , then he let out a little whimper ,  and jumped up to lick Ken junior's face again . 

" Get out of it you mongrel ! , Ken junior said .  

 Dog suddenly took off after the stick . 

The lads and I started unloading the ute , which proved to be an annoying task .  Mud stuck to our boots and left a trail down the hall.   Dog kept dropping a drool covered stick at our feet .  Ken junior had tied everything down with rope , using  his so called " truckie knots ' that don't quite release the way they should . 

"I see you have used your Gordian knots again . " , I said . 

" What does that mean ? " , Ken junior said . 

" It means you can't untie them unless you happen to be Alexander The Great with a bloody sword ." , I said . 

" Stop exaggerating , I 'll show you how to do it . " , Ken junior said . 

Ken junior walked to my side of the ute , looked at the knot , shook his head with disdain , and sliced through the rope with his pocket knife . 

"It's as simple as that . ' , Ken junior said . 

 I grabbed a carton of beer .

" I will take this up to the house. "  I said . 

 The lads watched me pick my way carefully through the muddy backyard , beer carton on one shoulder .

" Do you think he's given up ?" , Monte said . 

 " Yeah , I think so . ", Gabbo said . 

  They were right . 

 Your comrade , Ken 

" 

 

 

 

Reference :- We are running out of supplies out here in Kooralya .

Reference:-    The shelves at the local store are bare . Something must be done .  

We have run out of of groceries and other essentials at present . We used to call such a circumstance a life threatening shortage , although these days the preferred terminology is " supply chain problem " .   It's a long way to the big smoke . A gentleman of my years needs to take it easy , so I figured Ken junior should volunteer to undertake the long drive in the ute . 

"  You will have to take the ute and get some supplies . " , I said . 

 " Not to the big smoke , I hate it there . " , Ken junior said . 

 " We have no choice . " , I said 

  " But the roads are stuffed from the weekend floods . " ,  Ken junior said 

 "  We can't let the damage from a once in a hundred years flood deprive us of essential goods . ", I said 

"  That's the fifth once in a hundred years flood we've had since I got my license . ",  Ken junior said . 

" Be that as it may , you just have to make the trip. There a lots of things we need , and we are relying on you . " , I said . 

 " It's a bloody rat race down there , I won't go . ", Ken junior said . 

 " Look son , I know it is a rat race down there , but we don't need rapid antigen tests , they aren't vital right now ",  I said . 

" What is vital right now  ? " , Ken junior said . 

  " The items on this list I am handing you  . " ,  I said 

  Ken junior looked at the list . 

  " These things aren't very essential . " , Ken junior said . 

 " We are also out of beer . " ,  I said . 

 " Are the keys in the ute ? " ,  Ken junior said . 

   " Yeah. And don't thrash it , it's overdue for a service . " , I said . 

 We should see him back here by Saturday , all going well. 

 Your comrade , Ken 

Reference :- The Sky Reply doesn't usually cover sports news . But today is different .

Reference :-   Tennis champ Novak Djokovic  has been granted an exemption from covid vaccination so he can enter the country and make lots of money ... for himself and others . 

We were eating our cornflakes this morning when Ken junior spoke . 

" Novak Djokovic  had been granted a Covid exemption  . " ,  Ken junior said . 

" Who's Novak Djokovik ? " ,  I said . 

" He's the champ , he's coming to play at the Australian Open . "  , Ken junior said . 

 " The open what ? ", I said . 

 " Tennis . Pass the cornflakes . " , Ken junior said . 

 " Why did he get an exemption ",  I said . 

 " They won't say . " , Ken junior said . 

 That was no surprise .   Nobody in the halls of power ever tells us why they made a decision these days .  I guess that's because the explanation is always the same .... to pander to the rich and powerful . 

" He may be a privileged  pain in the arse , but he sure has a powerful backhand . "  , Monte said . 

" Stuff his powerful backhand  . A powerful backhander is what he deserves . " ,  I said .  

 Despite being tennis fans themselves , the lads agreed with me .  Lets hope the organizers lose money due to boycotts .  Personally I am not much into tennis . I don't even know how many serves there are in an over .  But it sure would be ironic if Mr Djokovic stepped off the plane into our covid infested environs and got  himself all clapped up with contagion .

Your comrade , Ken . 

Reference :- It's a shame Rowan Dean 's Ice Age Watch is in recess.

 Reference :-   A wildfire in Colorado destroyed over one thousand buildings before it was doused by winter snows. 

Dear Rowan , 

                           I hope your Ice Age Watch show returns to the airwaves soon .  Did you see that the Colorado wildfire was smothered by a sudden winter snowfall ?   That certainly proves that uncontrollable infernos aren't caused by summer heat waves .  This one happened in the middle of winter for Pete's sake . 

Ken junior  said that he sure wished  he could have seen you on the tele standing before images of snow falling on burnt out SUVs.     I am with him there , although I told him images  of snow on burnt out cars would have more impact .  Ken junior said that an SUV is a car .  The lad obviously doesn't know what he is talking about , but I let that one slip through to the keeper .

I hope you are enjoying a pleasant break and look forward to seeing you again soon .  It's a shame about your associate Alan Jones being sacked .  Then again , he is no spring chicken and it is probably wise for him to stay at home , what with the pandemonium surrounding the fake pandemic and all . 

Your comrade , Ken . 

Reference :- Ken junior saw a business opportunity , but I could smell a rat.

Reference :- Ken junior paid over the odds for some  Rapid Antigen Tests that he purchased on the web . 

 

Ken junior nearly fainted when his credit card bill arrived  , bloated as it is by Christmas spending .  

" I need to make some money fast . " ,  Ken junior said .  

" We live in the land of opportunity , you will think of something " ,  I said . 

A few days later we found a package on the verandah .  Dog sniffed it and lost interest immediately , 

but Ken junior grabbed it enthusiastically . 

" This is my ticket to financial independence . "  , Ken junior said . 

" What's in it ? " , Monte said . 

" A couple of dozen RATS . " , Ken junior said . 

"  What are you doing buying rats when there are a dozens in the shed you can catch for free . " , I said . 

" Jesus dad , these are Rapid Antigen Tests for Covid  . Every entrepreneur in the country has jumped on the  RAT bandwagon . I can sell these for a fortune ." , Ken junior said. 

"  Look son , we have laws against price gouging in this country . We have an independent authority called the Australian Competition and Consumer Commission .   Nobody will be allowed to price gouge for a vital health product .  The ACCC will come down on them like a ton of ironbark . ", I said . 

Well for some reason everybody started laughing.  They laughed and laughed and laughed until their ribs hurt . Then just when they had caught their breath Gabbo said  " Do you think Scotty from marketing is opposed to the concept of price gouging ? " , and everybody started laughing again . 

 Anyway , when everybody had calmed down Ken junior offered me a discount on one of his Rapid Antigen Tests .   

 " Hey dad , I can sell you one at a special rate . Only 45 quid to you , as a family member . " , Ken junior said . 

" These tests should be provided free of charge by the government ." , I said .

"  Mr Morrison tells us we can't have everything for free . Freebies distort the market . "  ,  Ken junior said . 

 " We didn't ask for  everything to be free . We asked for a crucial health test to be free . They are free in other countries . "  , I said . 

 " Like where ? . " Ken junior said . 

" Lots of countries , even France . " , I said . 

" Yeah , well that's the French for you . They don't even know the meaning of the word entrepreneur . ", Ken junior said . 

"Well you can stick you 45 quid test kit up your nose as far as I am concerned . " , I said . 

 It's amazing how debt can destroy a person's ethics .........and common sense . 

Your comrade , Ken .

 

 

 

Reference :- It's been a dull Christmas here at Kooralya .

Reference :- With the Sky News anchors on holidays , or in rehab , or getting their Botox injections , or whatever it is they do over Christmas , there has been little work for us here at The Sky Reply .  

After dealing with all the usual Christmas chores  , it was time to slip down to the Post Office and collect the mail .   We like to keep a list of the things we must attend to once the Christmas festivities have ended . It's much the same every year . A trip to the local tip with lots of wrapping paper , boxes , rotting food , and piles of empty booze bottles.  A couple of sympathy calls  to friends whose partners left them after a Christmas Day argument .  A Boxing Day sale excursion to the general store to stock up on 303 cartridges .  A phone call to the Kooralya cop shop to see if anybody needs bailing out . And a visit to the hospital to cheer those who were injured in a brawl at the pub or came down with sudden inexplicable pancreatitis . 

Anyway , we were greatly pleased to find a dodger in the mail explaining the government's strategy for the imminent federal election .  It's been a tough few years , and citizens are looking for something fresh to buoy their spirits .  And Mr Morrison's team has not let us down .   Marketing gurus tell us that a three word catch phrase is what folk respond to , and the LNP has come up with a beauty . 

The economy is fighting back , we are told ,  and it is up to us as individuals to join with the economy as it fights back  .   That is sound advice , since nobody would wish to be left behind as the economy gets back into it's stride .  So the new catch phrase is  " Growth and Jobs ".   What  a refreshing change from the tired old slogan " Jobs and Growth  that miraculously saw the Tories win the last election . 

That's the thing about the LNP , they have the talent to produce fresh ideas and innovate as the need arises .  I reckon they have the next election in the bag already . 

Your comrade , Ken