Reference: - Climate change denialist and puerile imitator of Greta Thunberg , Rowan Dean , is a bit slow off the blocks with his usual prancing rant about the climate change hoax on his "Outsiders " show . But we are shivering with anticipation .
Rowan , my son Ken junior, and his best school mates are wagging it today . ( The school is probably closed due to the fires anyway . ) They are all stocked up with popcorn waiting for your take on the massive snowfalls in the USA . I think they said about 300 towns and cities are experiencing record low temperatures . This is an absolute gift for you !
I suggest you wear baggy trousers to conceal your tumescence . Ken junior , and the lads , expect lots of prancing about and hand waving , and the extended pronunciation of certain words .
You know , cold as coooold , greenies as greeeenies . Don't let us down , we have a little game running . We have two teams playing our favourite sport , " Outsiders " cricket . This is how it works . Each time you prance to the other side of the stage , the current batsman is deemed "out ". While you remain on one side , runs are scored . For example , each time you say "fake global warming "
a run is scored . Two runs for " climate conspiracists " . And so on , are you with me ? Don't let the lads down Rowan . One more thing . Don't mention that rising global temperatures are causing the polar vortex to swing south , it will only confuse the issue . If somebody else mentions it first , say this . " To a climate alarmist , like a man with a hammer , everything looks like a nail . " It's becoming a bit tired , but is a line favoured by Andy Bolt . I am sure he wouldn't mind if you use it .
Don't forget to wear a beanie, scarf and gloves .
Your comrade , Ken
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