Reference :- Mainstay journalist at Sky News , Rowan Dean , raised the standard at Sky News with a cutting edge story .

Reference :-  We can trust young Rowan Dean to give us the facts without any sugar coating . 

 

Dear Rowan , 

                             What with all the pointless distractions on the news these days , like war in Ukraine , interest rates raises , and the pommie pound sinking faster than the Lusitania  , we were relieved to find that you are still delivering " news that matters " in Sky News tradition . 

We refer , of course , to your in-depth analysis of the the new chocolate M and M that has been thrust upon the market while nobody is paying attention .  This purple disgrace , you tell us , has been added to the cast of M and M characters to represent  " acceptance and inclusivity ".    If you hadn't spread the word , many of us would have chowed down on the ghastly woke confection without realising . 

I mean honestly , who on earth could believe that " acceptance and inclusivity " are likely to achieve anything in this divided world ?   Gandhi used to bang on about that rubbish all the time , and I ask you Rowan , where did that get him ?  That's right , shot to death in the street like a rabid dog , that's where . 

Anyway , keep up the good work .  It's clear to those of us who still have a few synapses sparking that the elite are trying to distract us from the real news by paying the commercial media to sensationalise stories of little significance .  They would have free rein to do anything to our chocolate confectionery were it not for the dedicated few , like yourself , who hold true to their professional ethics and refuse to be bought .

If the M and M people want to add another character to their  cast , I reckon they should do a big fat male one in expensive shoes smoking a cuban cigar . They could call him " Freemarket M and M " , and he would represent the success of neoliberalism and the western capitalist system .  Naturally he would be made from white chocolate , and if anyone objected they could be accused of being non-inclusive . 

Ken junior has actually designed  an " Austerity M and M  " , all dressed in rags with bare feet .  But I told him it wouldn't sell well , dark chocolate is not very popular . 

Your comrade , Ken