Reference :- The landmark 500th Sky Reply cannot be released while legal action is pending .
It all started the other night when we decided to celebrate by pigging out on Ken junior's latest batch of herb cookies . Monte beckoned us to the back yard where we could better see the glittering galaxy . There were many ooos and aahhs as we gazed at the splendor of the Milky Way . The luminosity of the myriad stars seemed strangely accentuated .
" The night sky is like a painting by that Vincent van Gogh chap . " I said .
Ken junior looked up and starting singing .
" Starry starry night . Paint your palette blue and grey " , Ken junior sang .
" Hey that's a nice song ." , Monte said .
" I just composed it . " , Ken junior said .
" What about Don McLean ? " , Monte said .
" I composed that too ." , Ken junior said .
" Can anybody think of something else poetic ? " , I said
Gabbo spoke up .
" Look at the stars , look up at the skies ! O look at all the fire folk sitting in the air ! The bright boroughs , the circle -citadel there! Down in dim woods the diamond delves ! "
" That's Gerard Manley Hopkins , if you have heard of him . " , Gabbo said .
" I know lots about poetry and I certainly know who Very Manly Hopkins is . " , Monte said .
" Well recite us a poem then . " , Gabbo said .
" Twinkle twinkle little star . How I wonder what you are . " , Monte said .
Everybody thought that was hilarious , and we couldn't stop laughing . But after a few more cookies the mood changed . A colony of fruit bats decided to camp the night in our mango tree . They appeared by the dozen , swooping and screeching . It was like the opening scene in that Hunter S Thompson novel . Suddenly we were consumed by fear and loathing .
Well it was all downhill from there . Ken junior reckoned we were guilty of shameless plagiarism . But Gabbo said we were obsessed with nostalgic cultural references because we no longer have a culture .
" All we have now is interest rates , property values , share portfolios , debt to GDP ratios , lethal contagion , environmental devastation and war. " , Gabbo said .
" It's all the fault of big business , neoliberalism and the mass media " , Ken junior said .
" And Sky News is the chief culprit . " , Monte said .
Nobody could think straight , what with all the swooping screeching bats , and the gnawing hunger pains .
Ken junior decided to phone for 4 delivered pizzas with garlic bread .
" I don't think that will be enough " , Monte said .
" I mean four pizzas each ." , Ken junior said .
Anyway , we then sat down and wrote Sky Reply number 500 . It was meant to be constructive criticism , but in retrospect we might have gone a bit hard on the Sky News anchors . A thin line often separates constructive criticism from defamatory abuse .
We have received a letter from a law firm , complete with the standard threats , spelling errors and confusing grammar .
If somebody could let us know how to contact that anonymous benefactor who shelled out for Attorney General ( retired ) Christian Porter's legal fees we would be forever grateful .
Ken junior is baking a few more batches of herb cookies to sell , but I don't think that will cover the cost of a competent mouthpiece when we appear before the magistrate .
Your comrade , Ken .
